The Infinite Dvorak Deck is an ever-expanding card game, which anyone can add cards to. There's no coherent theme, and cards can be original, inspired by anything, copied from other Dvorak decks, or even dragged in verbatim from other card games.
The only rules to adding cards are:-
- Don't add more than three cards at a time; give someone else a chance to add some, before you add any more. And make sure you put your cards at the bottom of the page.
- Don't change other people's cards. If something seems ambiguous or broken, tell them on the talk page. (There's an option to filter specified users' cards out when you export the deck to play with, so don't worry too much if someone's cards are irredeemably unplayable.)
- Cards shouldn't refer to other cards. Remember that the deck is infinite! Cards should avoid making any specific references to other cards or mechanics, because they might never see those specific cards during play, particularly if you think of the deck as infinite. You should word your mechanics as generically as possible - a fishing rod card that said "gain control of a fish" would be useless in a game where no fish cards came up, whereas one that said "gain control of a living Thing" would probably see some use in any game that it got drawn in.
- (A good test is to open a random archive page of the Infinite Dvorak Deck, and see how many of its cards your new card could apply to. If there are only one or two cards that you could play it on, then you should probably word it more generically.)
- No special rules. This deck has no Special Rules aside from the two described below; it's all on the cards. Cards should not create Special Rules (or any equivalent "invisible" effect that significantly outlives the lifetime of the card); players should only have to read the cards on the table to know what's going on.
- Values in the corners of cards are meaningless, unless there's another card in play that somehow gives them meaning.
Whenever anyone's feeling insane enough to play a game of it, they can export it to the Dvorak Engine, or possibly Apprentice (if it's possible to make decks that contain every card of a set).
Special Rules
The only rules that this deck uses in addition to the basic Dvorak rules are:-
- Tokens exist. Some cards can create or destroy or manipulate "tokens", which you should represent with whatever coins or counters you have to hand. Tokens count as Things, but if a token is destroyed or otherwise removed from play, it's removed from the game entirely. Tokens usually have individual types (such as "Energy" or "Goblin"); if a token has a type, that's also considered to be its name, otherwise its name is just "Token".
- If there's an ambiguity, vote on it. For example: if a card says to destroy a "living" Thing, and a player is wondering if it'll work against a "zombie" card, the players should take a vote to determine whether or not the zombie counts as living. If a majority decision can't be reached, resolve it randomly.
Selected Sets
If you'd prefer a more compact subset of the deck, you may appreciate one of the following:
Superpower set, Token set, Flavor set
Expansions
These expansions add cards and/or rules to games using the Infinite Dvorak deck or its subsets:
Dvanguard set, Dvanguard booster pack, Shroud booster pack, Illusion booster pack, Up Your Sleeve booster pack, Swords booster pack, Vintage booster pack, ChippyYYZ booster pack
Card List
- The earlier cards of this deck have been archived: 1-100, 101-200, 201-300, 301-400, 401-500, 501-600, 601-700, 701-800, 801-900, 901-1000, 1001-1100, 1101-1200, 1201-1300, 1301-1400, 1401-1500, 1501-1600, 1601-1700, 1701-1800, 1801-1900, 1901-2000, 2001-2100, 2101-2200, 2201-2300, 2301-2400, 2401-2500, 2501-2600, 2601-2700, 2701-2800, 2801-2900, 2901-3000, 3001-3100, 3101-3200, 3201-3300, 3301-3400, 3401-3500, 3501-3600, 3601-3700, 3701-3800, 3801-3900, 3901-4000, 4001-4100, 4101-4200, 4201-4300, 4301-4400, 4401-4500, 4501-4600, 4601-4700, 4701-4800, 4801-4900, 4901-5000, 5001-5100, 5101-5200, 5201-5300, 5301-5400, 5401-5500, 5501-5600, 5601-5700, 5701-5800, 5801-5900, 5901-6000, 6001-6100, 6101-6200, 6201-6300.
Slave to Fashion
Thing
Slave to Fashion counts as a copy of the most recently played Thing.
If Slave to Fashion is the most recently played Thing, it counts as a copy of Pure Clwnage.
Arcane Invocation
Action
Destroy any number of non-living Things and replace each with a living Thing from your hand, then draw the same number of cards and gain a Strawberry Candy token.
Trojan Horse
Thing
If Trojan Horse enters a player's hand from another player's hand or another player's control, the recipient must discard their hand.
Reaction Thing
Play when an Action targets a Thing. It targets this instead. For the purpose of that Action only, this is a copy of the original target.
Since when did smashed bottles go 'pop'?
Thing
At the start of each player's turn, they gain a Toxin token.
At the end of each player's turn, they lose the game if they have 4 or more Toxin tokens.
Radioactive waste? Mercury? Month-old leftovers?
Thing
Apparently, you are allowed to play up to two cards of any type during each of your turns. Both of them can be Actions or both can be Things.
...I think that's what it says.
Reserve Tank
Thing
When Reserve Tank is destroyed, draw three cards. If you only have one card in your hand, you may destroy Reserve Tank at any time; if your hand is empty, destroy it immediately.
Going In Blind
Thing
Every player must play the card they draw at the beginning of their turns without looking at it first.
Sphinx's Shield
Thing
Whenever a player plays an Action card, you may have one sentence on that card be treated as "Draw a card."
Every mistake is a chance to learn, and the sphinx does enjoy teaching.
Sphinx's Boomerang
Action
Draw a card.
Instead of playing a Thing this turn, you may put target Thing on top of the deck.
Put Sphinx's Boomerang on top of the deck. Reorder the top three cards of the deck.
Imbue With Plot Armor
Action
Each player may put a Shield Token on a non-token Thing they control. When one of those Things would be destroyed, remove a Shield token from it instead. You may put an additional Shield counter on one of those Things.
Thing
Play this card into any player's control. Whenever you try to play a card or activate an Action ability, you have a 50% chance to fail to actually do so, although it does still count toward your per-turn limit. Lame.
Ctrl+Alt+Delete: If you have not played any cards this turn, you may end your turn and destroy Lag.
Limp
Thing
Play this card into any player's control. Instead of drawing at the beginning of your turns, you draw at the end.
Shy Ghost
Thing
As soon as you see Shy Ghost, shuffle it into the draw pile. If Shy Ghost comes into play under your control, you win the game.
Cat On Your Lap
Thing
Play this card into any player's control.
When you play your second card in a turn, destroy Cat On Your Lap, discard a card, and destroy all tokens you control.
Bottled Tactics
Thing
When Bottled Tactics enters play, put the top 5 cards of the deck face-down underneath it.
When Bottled Tactics is destroyed, look at the cards underneath it. Play one of them and put the rest on top of the deck in any order.
Tweezers
Action
Erase any number of "Thing:" abilities from Things in play. "Action and Thing:" abilities are unaffected.
Good for taking small things out of bigger things.
Action
Destroy up to 5 of your Things and draw that many cards. You may take an extra Action this turn.
If you drew 5 and your hand becomes empty before the end of the turn, you win.
Thing
At the start of your turn, destroy one of your Things and draw an extra card.
You may play up to two extra Things each turn.
Never stop improving.
Action
Each player who controls a Thing discards down to 3 cards in hand. Then destroy all non-token Things.
You have grown too attached to your precious cardboard.
Supersonic Low Altitude Missile
Action
Destroy target Thing. For every living Thing controlled by the same player, flip a coin: on tails, the radiation destroys it as well.
Action
Destroy half of all tangible Things at random.
Nor'easter
Action
Every player must put two cards from their hand face down on the table. Shuffle all of these together and deal them alternately onto the discard pile and draw pile, starting with the discard pile.
Munchies
Thing
When Munchies enters play, gain a Snack Token.
At the beginning of your turn, each player gains a Snack Token.
Snack Tokens enter play with "During your turn, you may sacrifice this token to draw a card if you haven't drawn more than one card this turn."
A bowl of snack mix makes excellent neutral ground.
Alphabet Souperpowers
Thing
You may play an additional card during your turn if its title begins with a letter not present in the titles of Things you control other than this one.
YYZEvolution
Action
Reveal the top 8 cards of the deck. For each of those cards, you may play that card by moving a Thing you control with the same creator or with fewer words in its rulestext into the discard pile. Shuffle the rest into the deck.
"Begun field testing of modular abstrata, should allow for quick reconfiguration of even complex designs if power couplings are compatible." --ChippyYYZ's journal
The Last Word
Thing
There is no limit to the number of Actions or Things you may play during your turn. If this Thing is under your control at the end of your turn, lose the game.
'It's the legendary Black Beast of Aughhhhh'
Famous First Words
Action
Erase everything from target Thing's text and flavourtext except for the first sentence of each.
He just said 'baldy'! Must be talking about you, papa.
Word Of The Day
Thing
Choose a word of length 4 characters or longer and write it in this card's flavourtext. All players cannot play cards that do not contain the word in this card's flavourtext as long as there are any cards that do contain that word in their hand.
Thing - Robot
Action:Target opponent chooses one:
*You draw two cards.
*Play every card in your hand, then end the turn.
*That opponent discards a random card and gains a Headache token.
"Ugh." "Share and enjoy."
Thing - Robot
Action:Give an opponent a card from your hand. They play it if possible, but you make all their decisions.
Thing - Robot
Action:Discard a card. Gain three tokens whose type is a non-action noun on the discarded card.
Safety Net
Thing
You may draw a card whenever your hand is empty at the end of your turn.
Ancient Magical Tome
Thing
When you play this card, put the five Actions closest to the bottom of the draw pile face-down under this card, then shuffle the draw pile. Action: Discard a card to invoke one of the Tome's Actions and flip a coin. On tails, that page of the Tome crumbles to dust: discard the Action.
Responsibility
Thing
If you control this Thing when your turn begins, win the game. Any player may, at the start of their turn, choose instead to skip their turn. Whenever a player does this, destroy this Thing.
Autopilot
Action
Draw two cards, then play a random Thing and a random Action from your hand if possible, with any targets required by either also chosen randomly. Cards played this way do not count towards your limit for Actions or Things played this turn.
Group Contribution
Thing
When you play this card, each opponent must suggest a rulestext for this card. You may then append any number of those suggestions to this card's rulestext. If you do not append any suggestions to this card's text, it instead reads 'Action + Thing: Put this card in your hand. Any player may use this ability'
Thing - Robot
When you play this and at the start of your turn, reveal a random card from target opponent's hand.
Action: Destroy Spy Drone and discard the most recent card it revealed if it's still in an opponent's hand.
Thing - Robot
Thing:Gain a Node token. Action: This becomes a Filter Node until it leaves play.
Filter Node is from page 24 of the archive.
Thing - Robot
Action:Destroy a Thing you control and draw a card. If you destroyed a Robot, draw two cards instead.
Fruitful Brainstorming Session
Action
Draw three cards. Choose one to play, one to keep in your hand, and one to either discard or give to an opponent.
Balloon Party
Thing
This card comes into play with one yellow Balloon token.
Action: Gain a Balloon token in your choice of color.
Action: Pop one Balloon. Target opponent is so startled that they discard a card.
Action: Tie three Balloons to target Thing, which floats away and is destroyed.
Lasso
Thing
Action - Coil: Until the end of your next turn, you may use the following ability once:
- "Action - Rope: Gain control of a tangible Thing."
Clone Fuel
Action
Choose a Thing you control. Destroy all other Things you control, then place a copy of the chosen Thing in your hand for each Thing destroyed this way.
Chain Deathsplosion
Thing
When Chain Deathsplosion comes into play under your control, destroy all other Things that you control. If Chain Deathsplosion is destroyed, you may create a copy of it under the control of a chosen opponent.
Defeat Means Friendship
Action
Until the end of your turn, whenever a Thing is destroyed a copy of it comes into play under your control.
Thing - Robot
Action:Give target player a Warning token.
Action:Eliminate a player who has three Warnings.
Thing - Robot
Flying
Action:Give an opponent one of your other Things and look at their hand.
Thing - Robot
Once per turn, you may discard a card to gain 2 Energy Tokens.
Action:Spend an energy token to destroy a living, undead or robotic Thing, or a Thing that changed controllers since your last turn.
Token Focus
Thing
If you have at least 4 cards in your hand, then once per turn when you gain one or more tokens of a type, you may gain an additional token of that type.
Ion Flux
Action
Destroy target Thing. If you control any energy tokens, remove that Thing from the game instead and gain an Energy Token for each energy token you control.
Desperate Measures
Thing
When another Thing you control would be destroyed by an effect controlled by an opponent, you may draw two cards.
When Desperate Measures is destroyed, you may discard two random cards to return it to your hand.
Thing - Robot
Action:Target Thing's text becomes blank until the end of your next turn.
Reaction: When an opponent's Thing destroys a Thing or uses its Action ability, use Auto Bailiff's Action ability on it for free immediately afterwards.
Thing
Things this is attached to have their ruletext ignored.
Action:Attach this to target Thing and release any other attached Things.
Action
Destroy a Thing. If it had an Action ability, activate it one last time.
Allbeard, Avatar Of Piracy
Thing - Pirate
Opponents cannot draw cards. The first time you would draw a card each turn, you may choose to draw an additional card for each opponent you face. At the start of your turn, if any opponents have empty hands, destroy Allbeard and discard your hand.
Organ Wrangler
Thing
While this is in play, its controller treats the draw pile as if it were the discard pile and vice versa. Whenever you draw a card from the discard pile, if that card was the last card in the pile you win the game.
Really did a number on me, especially when he put my digestive tract in back-to-front.
Bad Habit
Thing
Whilst Bad Habit is in your hand, you cannot play Actions. If Bad Habit is the only Thing you control, return it to your hand.
Enchanted Coffee Mug
Thing
If you do not play a Thing or use this card's ability during your turn, either destroy this card or reveal that your hand contains no Actions to return it to your hand instead.
Thing: Play an Action card.
Zealous Delivery Service
Thing
Action: Give target opponent a card from your hand so forcefully that another random card in their hand falls out into the discard pile.
Lazy Delivery Service
Thing
Action: Give target opponent a card from your hand, but instead of handing it directly to them, feel free to just toss it nonchalantly onto the table in front of them, you know, whatever. If it lands face-down at an odd angle, you've done your job: draw a card.
Powerwash
Action
Shuffle all Things into the deck. You may play this as a reaction to an Action, instead shuffle the discard pile into the deck.
Card by Y3K
Action
Take two extra turns after this one, but you can't play cards during those turns.
Action
Discard your hand and draw that many cards. If you haven't played any other cards this turn, end the turn, then the player whose turn ended takes another turn.
Action
Destroy up to three of your own non-Token Things, then reveal target player's hand; that player discards the same number of cards of your choice.
Wiretap
Thing
Whenever a chosen opponent draws a card, you may look at it.
A Trick of the Light
Reaction
Play immediately in response when one of your Things would be destroyed. Return it to your hand instead.
Hammer Dance
Thing
If this card has any tokens when your turn begins, you must activate one of its abilities during your turn or destroy it. If it is destroyed with two or more tokens on it, fumble: discard a card.
Action: Gain a Spin or Twirl token.
Action - Percussive Flourish: Consume a Spin or Twirl to return a tangible Thing to its controller's hand, or one of each to destroy a tangible Thing.
Solar Panel
Thing
When Solar Panel comes into play, each player gains an Energy Token.
Whenever a player plays a card with any of the strings "sun", "light", or "star" in its title, that player gains an Energy Token.
Another Magnet
Action
Target player gives you two of their tokens. If they can't, they give you control of one of their Things.
Straw Man
Thing
Straw Man counts as both a Thing and a Player under its controller's control (it is still your opponent).
Straw Man cannot draw cards or have cards in its hand.
At the end of your turn, Straw Man takes a turn.
Theft By Numbers
Thing
Choose a digit from 0 to 9. Whenever a card with that digit in its title or cornervalue is played by an opponent, put it in your hand instead.
Invisible Ink Contract
Thing
Action: Target blank thing gains the rulestext 'If you control 5 or more things with this rulestext, win the game'.
9000 Unstoppable Volts
Action
Destroy target Thing with an activated ability. Create an Action card with the text of that Thing's ability and give a copy of it to all players.
Action
Discard some cards. If you discarded at least
1: Destroy a Thing
2: Draw a card
3: Gain control of all tokens
5: Everyone else discards their hand
8: Eliminate target player
(Do all that apply)
Action
Choose an opponent and a Thing you control. They trade one of their non-token Things of their choice for your chosen Thing.
Thing - Robot
When an opponent plays an Action card, you may use an Action ability in response.
Action:Gain a Police-Drone token if you have less than two of them.
Defective Knockoff
Thing
Play this card onto target Thing. Attached Thing's Action abilities are considered blank.
Burning Sensation
Thing - Spell
Discard a card to play Burning Sensation into any player's control.
Flip a coin at the end of your turns: on tails, you must discard a card.
It doesn't actually cause injury, but it hurts a lot.
Easier to Ask Forgiveness Than Permission
Action
“Borrow” an opponent's Thing. Apologize if they get angry at you.
Department of Victory Committee
Thing - Bureaucracy
Any player may skip their turn to gain a License Token. If an effect controlled by a player would destroy a License Token that player doesn't control, that player discards their hand.
Players who do not control a License Token may not win the game.
ChainChainmail
Thing
When this card comes into play, attach it to another ChainChainmail you control. If you don't control another ChainChainmail, attach it to any other Thing you control and put a copy of ChainChainmail into play.
If the Thing ChainChainmail is attached to would be destroyed, destroy this card instead.
Chainreactionmail
Thing
When this card comes into play, attach it to another Thing you control.
The Thing this card is attached to cannot be destroyed by any effect that would simultaneously destroy any other Things, or that has already destroyed any Things in this resolution of that effect. If an effect destroys the Thing this card is attached to, this resolution of that effect cannot destroy other Things this turn.
Haunted House
Thing
When Haunted House enters play, every player must place one card from their hand face down on the table and put a Ghost token on it. At the end of your next turn after playing Haunted House, destroy it along with all Ghost tokens and every card with a Ghost token on it.
Stern Admonition
Reaction
Play immediately in response to an opponent's Action card. Return that Action to the opponent's hand; it may not be played during this turn.
Dramatic Irony
Action
Look at as many cards on the top of the draw pile as you have opponents and end your turn.
Thing
Players must discard another Action to play an Action card, unless the Action shares a cornervalue with a Thing they control.
Thing - Robot
Whenever you use an Action ability of a Thing, you may destroy that Thing to draw 2 cards.
Action: Discard your hand.
Thing
One per turn: You may do something that another card explicitly forbids you to do.
Gnome Ann is above the law.
It's Over, Isn't It?
Action
If there are fewer players than the game began with, target player discards their hand and draws three cards.
Too Short To Ride
Thing
Players with fewer cards in their hand than you may not play Things.
At the start of an opponent's turn, if you have more than 4 cards in your hand, put this card in the discard pile.
Guacola
Thing - Food?
When Guacola enters play, gain 5 Money Tokens. When Guacola is destroyed, draw a card.
Action: Take a sip. Discard a card in immediate regret and destroy Guacola.
It's not even good on chips.
Stylish New Haircut
Thing
Draw a card.
Draw an extra card at the beginning of your next three turns after this card is played, then remove the word “New” from its title.
Flywheel
Thing
If Flywheel has fewer than five cards under it when your turn starts, you may draw cards until you draw an Action, put it face-down under Flywheel, and shuffle the other cards into the draw pile. If Flywheel is destroyed, discard its Actions and you and its destroyer must both discard two random cards. Thing - Discharge: Put Flywheel's Actions into your hand.
Fishing Net
Action
Gain control of the most recently discarded tangible Thing and three Fish tokens.
Thing/Action/Reaction
As a Thing: Attach to a Thing. If it's targetted by an Action, that action targets Shell instead.
As an Action: Destroy a Thing
As a Reaction: Play when a Thing becomes a target to make it indestructible for the rest of the turn.
Action
Reveal cards from the top of the deck until you've revealed an Action and a Thing. Put an Action and a Thing from them into your hand and discard the rest.
Action
Target player gains a Thirst token and discards two cards
OR destroy a living Thing
OR destroy all flammable Things
OR Eliminate each opponent with a Thirst token.
Legecy Wepon
Thing - Legandary
Other Things you control cannot be the target of actions or effects.
At the end of your turn, erase all rulestext from target Thing.
During your turn, you control all Things in play.
You can build an imperfect machine out of perfect parts.
Garbageman's Boon
Action
Play the top card of the discard pile
OR play the bottom card of the discard pile
OR put a card from the discard pile into your hand and discard a card.
Breaking Point
Thing
Action: Remove target Thing from the game and eliminate yourself.
"Enough!"
Wily Gatekeeper
Thing - Townsperson
If another of your Things would be destroyed, you may either discard a card to prevent its destruction or draw a card.
Any player may gain control of this card by destroying a Money token or discarding a card whose ruletext contains every letter in this card's title.
Vigilant Bodyguard
Thing - Townsperson
If another of your Things would be destroyed, you may instead return it to your hand along with Vigilant Bodyguard. Alternatively, if it would be destroyed by an opponent's Thing, you may instead destroy that Thing and Vigilant Bodyguard.
Precocious Initiate
Thing - Townsperson
You may immediately draw a card whenever your hand becomes empty. Your maximum hand size is increased by one for every Townsperson you control. At the end of your turns, you may draw one card and discard one card.
Channel The Forebears
Thing
You may play cards by ChippyYYZ as though they were Actions with the text "Draw three cards."
Other players may play cards by ChippyYYZ as though they were Actions with the text "Draw two cards."
Thing
Play into another player's control.
Discard a card when you gain this. Your maximum hand size is reduced by 1.
Thing
When you play this, move the top two Things in the discard pile under it in an order.
This has the first sentence of each Thing under it as extra ruletext (in that order), the last words of their names as an extra name, and their flavortexts (if any) as extra flavortext.
Action
Return target Thing in the discard pile to play under your control. At the start of your next turn, destroy it.
fu
Infinite Dvorak Roulette
Action
Change this card's text to 'When you draw this, lose the game.' and shuffle it back into the deck.
Action
Destroy all Things you control. Put all Things in your hand into play under your control.
Thing
Action + Action + Action: Play all Action cards in your hand. They do not count towards your Action limit this turn.
Action: Put an Action token on this card. Action tokens may be used instead of your Action each turn to pay for this card's abilities.
Projection
Action/Thing
Play this card as a copy of another card in your hand. Reveal that card as you play Projection.
Garnet Gauntlets
Thing
At the beginning of your turn, put Garnet Gauntlets on another Thing you control. That Thing is blank while Garnet Gauntlets is on it.
Action and Thing: Destroy target Thing.
Idea Recycler
Thing
Whenever you discard a card, you may put a blank Thing or Action card into your hand.
Action: Gain a Movie Token.
Master Procrastinator
Thing
Whenever you would play an action, instead put it underneath Master Procrastinator. When Master Procrastinator is destroyed, its controller plays all cards underneath it.
Punish The Lazy
Thing
Players may not draw cards unless they played at least one card on their previous turn.
Fog Investment Bank
Thing
For the purposes of all other cards, this has one Fog Token on it. Fog Investment Bank enters play with 10 Fog Tokens on it. Each turn, it gains one Fog Token for each 10 Fog Tokens on it. Action: Remove a Fog Token from this card and put it on target Thing.
Action
Target opponent can't take Actions or play non-Snipe Things on their next turn unless doing so destroys a Snipe. At the end of their turn, if they destroyed a Snipe, they draw two cards; otherwise, they discard a card at random.
Thing - Bird
When Snipe becomes a target, it returns to your hand. A player who destroys Snipe may draw three cards if any of their own Things survive.
Thing
When you play this, put target Thing Up Your Sleeve. When this leaves play, return that Thing to its controller if it's still Up Your Sleeve.
Visitor's Book
Action
When you play this, either write your name on it or win the game. You may only choose to win the game if the names of all players in the game are written on it. Then, shuffle it into the deck.
Beholder's Book
Action
Either put a Control token on target Thing and then return this card to your hand, or else gain control of all Things in play with Control tokens on them.
Protection From
Action/Thing
Protection From can be played as either an Action or a thing. If this is played as an Action, destroy target Thing. If this is played as a Thing, it cannot be targeted by Actions.
Doomsday Clock
Thing
This card comes into play with 1d6 Countdown tokens. At the end of each player's turn, destroy a Countdown token. If there are no Countdown tokens in play, destroy all Things. Action (global): This card gains 1d6 Countdown tokens.
Sin Bin
Action
Remove target Thing from play until the end of its controller's next turn.
Kula Ring
Thing
Every player may draw a card when this card is played. At the end of each player's turn, they must give a card from their hand to each of the opponents to their left and right; if they cannot, they are eliminated.
Gather Power
Action
Draw a card and gain an energy token.
If you have three or fewer cards in your hand, return Gather Power to your hand.
Supercycler
Thing
Action: Discard three cards. If you do, draw three cards.
Thing
Whenever you play a card from your hand, rotate Spin Attack 90° clockwise. If this causes Spin Attack to point directly away from you, you may destroy target Thing.
Action
Gain control of target Thing. Return it at the end of your next turn, or discard your hand if you can't return it.
Due Process
Thing
When a Thing you control would be targeted by an Action or activated ability, add a Bureaucracy token to Due Process. The card that targeted your Thing has no effect and is returned to its owner's hand. Then, if there are more Bureaucracy tokens on Due Process than there are players, revolutionize your administrative policies and destroy Due Process.
Timewaster
Thing
When you play Timewaster, return it to your hand and immediately end the current turn.
Imprinted Shapeshifter
Thing
Whenever a Thing enters play under the control of any player, this card becomes a copy of it. The copy retains the original text of Imprinted Shapeshifter in addition to the text of the card it is copying.
Most Important Meal of the Day
Thing
You may draw an extra card at the beginning of your turns.
Buried Treasure
Action
Draw a number of cards equal to the number of players and lay them face up on the table. Starting with you and proceeding in order, every player may select one to put into their hand.
Novelty Cookie Cutter
Thing
When this card enters play, specify a token type whose name does not appear on any Things currently in play. Action: Gain a token of the specified type.
Scabbard of Fate and Freedom
Thing
Action: Remove Scabbard of Fate and Freedom from the game. Choose three random Thing cards from the Swords booster pack. Create a copy of one of those cards and put it into play.
Benevolent Supervision
Thing
At the beginning of each player's turn, before they draw a card, that player may look at the top card of the deck. If it's a Thing, that player may put it into play.
At the end of your turn, you may look at the top card of the deck. If its creator is ChippyYYZ, you may play it immediately.
"As expected, production is up in all regions. Particularly those in which I have invested." -ChippyYYZ, log entry
Reversal of Fortune
Action
The player with the most cards in hand must discard until they have the same number as the player with the fewest. Then the player with the fewest may draw the same number of cards from the draw pile and/or the top of the discard pile, in any combination.
CORRUPTOR
Thing
Play this card into any player's control. At the end of your turns, a random Thing of yours and a random Thing controlled by an opponent each get a Corruption token. Things with one are considered to have no abilities; Things with two are considered to have no ruletext. If a Thing has three Corruption tokens, destroy it and replace it with a copy of this card.
Brain Drain
Thing
A player may not draw cards if they drew any cards during their previous turn.
Thing
Your maximum hand size is reduced by 1.
Whenever you discard a card due to max hand size, gain a Crate token.
Action:Destroy up to two Crates you control to draw that many cards.
Thing
When Giant Crate is destroyed, draw two cards
Action:Destroy Giant Crate
Action
Each opponent discards a random card. You gain a Crate token for each Thing discarded.
Oath of Fëanor
Action
Create three Things with the title "Silmaril" and the text "Indestructible. When only Fëanor controls any Silmarils, Fëanor wins the game. Fëanor cannot otherwise win the game while a Silmaril is in play." and shuffle them into the deck. Remove Oath of Fëanor from the game.
You are now Fëanor.
Dual-Hemisphere Brainstorm
Action
Instead of playing a Thing this turn, you may draw two cards.
Draw two cards and end your turn.
Psaphonic Reiteration
Thing
Thing: This ability has an identical effect to any Action card that you have played this turn. Then destroy Psaphonic Reiteration. If that Action card was by ChippyYYZ, return it to your hand.
Action
Draw a number of cards equal to the number you drew during your previous turn.
Action
Destroy a Thing; its former controller gains two Crate tokens.
Action Booster Pack
Action
Draw cards until you have drawn three Actions; keep them and shuffle the rest into the draw pile.
Thing Booster Pack
Action
Draw cards until you have drawn three Things; keep them and shuffle the rest into the draw pile.
Card Generator
Thing
Only one of Card Generator's abilities may be used per turn.
Action: Draw cards until you draw an Action; keep it and shuffle the rest into the draw pile.
Thing: Draw cards until you draw a Thing; keep it and shuffle the rest into the draw pile.
Action Trident
Action
Discard two other Action cards. If you do, destroy up to three target Things.
Video Game Loot
Thing
Once per turn, when a Token is destroyed, flip a coin. On a heads, draw a card. If the destroyed token was a Crate token, the flip is automatically heads.
Derisive Generosity
Thing
Action: Target player reveals a random card from their hand. They discard it unless it's the only card in their hand or its creator is ChippyYYZ.
"Why do you even bother trying to have opinions? I'm really doing you a favor by lending you mine." -ChippyYYZ
Action
Copy the most recent Action played. If that Action's creator is ChippyYYZ, one-up it by drawing a card afterwards.
Action
Destroy all Tokens. Each player draws a card for each of their Crate tokens destroyed this way. You draw a card for every 5 other Tokens destroyed (limit 5 cards).
Thing-Robot
When you play this, gain two Crate tokens.
At the start of your turn, you may destroy one of your Crate tokens to draw a card.
Everything Is Probably Mostly Fine
Action
Destroy a Thing that has imposed a restriction on your ability to draw or play cards.
Cargo Ship
Thing
When you play Cargo Ship, move it to Up Your Sleeve. It is in transit for two full turns. On your third turn since playing it, return it to play. Once per turn while it is in play, gain a Crate token with "Action: Destroy this and draw a card."
Runaway Reactant
Action
Append this card's ruletext to an Action in your hand.
Chaotic Reinvention
Action
Destroy all things created by ChippyYYZ. If a Thing you control is destroyed this way, you may draw two cards and you may put a Thing by ChippyYYZ from your hand into play.
" '[REDACTED]' -ChippyYYZ's journal"
-ChippyYYZ's new journal
Intrusive Accordance
Reaction
Play in response to an Action not created by ChippyYYZ that would destroy one or more Things not created by ChippyYYZ. That Action destroys none of those Things. Each player who controls that Action or one of those Things draws a card.
"Hold still, darn it! I'm trying to debug your friendship!"-ChippyYYZ
Evasive Intuition
Reaction
Play when you or a Thing you control becomes the target of an Action. That Action targets a random target instead.
If that Action is by ChippyYYZ, that Action targets a target of your choice instead.
"They sought to turn my own weapon against me, but its every nuance had its source in my thought. It could not help but function according to my design." -ChippyYYZ, log entry
Psionic Lensing
Action
Destroy a Thing. If its creator was ChippyYYZ, you may play a Thing into any player's control. If its creator is also ChippyYYZ, draw five cards. If you played it into the control of the same player whose original Thing you destroyed, they discard their hand first.
Birdcage
Thing
Cards under this card are considered to have no ruletext. Action: Discard a card to place target Thing under this card. Action (global): Regain control of one of your Things that was placed under this card.
Mosquito
Action
Target player realizes that they got bitten, probably sometime during their previous turn. They must discard a card and their maximum hand size is decreased by 1 until the end of their next turn.
How annoying.
Mutton Bashing
Action
Gain three Sheep Tokens.
B, A, A.
Slick Moves
Action
Look at the top 5 cards of the deck. Play two of them.
Trash Admiral
Thing
When you would draw a card, draw it from the top or bottom of the discard pile. If you can't, destroy Trash Admiral.
...Too Quiet.
Action
If no Things have been destroyed since your last turn, look at target opponent's hand. If they have a card that could destroy a Thing, they must discard their hand.
Positronic Flux Regulator
Thing
Whenever you would discard a card, besides at the end of your turn, draw a card instead.
Power Spike
Action
Activate an ability chosen at random from those on all Things in play.
Thing
At the start of your turn, win the game if you control at least twice as many crates as the number of remaining players.
Action:Discard a card. If it's a Thing, gain a Crate token.
When you lose Cargo Cult, destroy all your Crates and draw that many cards.
Action
Target Thing becomes a Crate with the text "Action:Destroy this and draw a card".
1796
Summon: George Washington
Reaction
Play immediately in response to an opponent's Action. Flip a coin to nullify its effect. If it was to have an effect on your hand or any Thing you control, it is nullified automatically instead.
"The disorders and miseries, which result, gradually incline the minds of men to seek security and repose in the absolute power of an individual..."
The Doge of Venice
Action
Set your hand aside. Draw six cards, discard two, draw five more, discard three at random and three more of your choice, then draw eight cards and discard four of your choice and three more at random. Choose one of the remaining cards to play and discard the others.
If it please you.
Clairvoyant Octopus
Thing
Play this card into any player's control.
When you would play a card, instead select two cards from your hand. Clairvoyant Octopus chooses one of them at random for you to play. If a per-turn limit prevents you from playing the card Clairvoyant Octopus has chosen, you play nothing instead.
Forehead-Mounted Viewscreen
Thing
Play this card into any player's control.
Action: Draw a card. Only any other player may use this ability.
"What's everybody looking at? Do I have something on my face?"
Cargomancy
Action
Put a Crate Token into play and return Cargomancy to your hand, OR destroy any number of Crates you control to draw that many cards.
Greater Cargomancy
Action
Put a Crate Token into play and return Greater Cargomancy to your hand. Instead of playing a Thing this turn, you may put a Crate Token into play.
OR
Destroy any number of Crates you control to draw that many cards.
Action
Destroy one Thing for each card played this turn (limit 5).
Thing
Your opponents' maximum hand sizes are reduced by the number of Nodes you control plus the number of Nodes they control (limit 4).
Effects that count Nodes are limited to 4 Nodes.
Action
Each player discards two cards. You draw a card for each red card discarded (limit 5).
Invented by a vampire mad scientist
Hasty Recitation
Action
Randomly select one of the top four Actions in the discard pile and play it again.
Charming Bakery
Thing
Action: Create a Pastry, Muffin, or Brownie token. Action: Target opponent pays you a card from their hand to buy one such token.
Negatronic Flux Regulator
Thing
Whenever you would draw a card, besides at the beginning of your turn, discard a card instead.
Starlight Glimmer
Thing - Pony
Action: For each player, blank the ruletext of target Thing that player controls.
Rounding Down
Thing
When you play an Action card, you may play another Action card if it has less than half as many words as the first. This doesn't count towards your Action per turn limit.
I only played 1.3 actions this turn, I'm below the legal limit, I swear.
Neutronic Flux Regulator
Thing
Whenever you play a card, discard a card. If you do, draw a card.
Rounding Up
Thing
When you play an Action card, you may play another Action card if it has more than twice as many words as the first. Only the final Action played in this way counts toward your Action per turn limit.
Overshadow
Reaction
Play immediately in response to an opponent's Action card. Play an Action card with more than twice as many words. Your opponent's Action is nullified and yours takes place instead.
Binarize
Action
Round a number on a Thing in play or a card in your hand to the nearest power of 2.
If the number is of the form 3·2n, you choose which way to round it.
Action Loader
Thing
Thing: Put an Action card from your hand into play face-up. It counts as a Thing while it's in play. For as long as it remains in play, its controller may play it on their turn without it counting towards their cards per turn.
Shining Armor
Thing - Pony
Other ponies you control can't be destroyed.
When a Thing you control would be destroyed, you may erase a sentence from Shining Armor's ruletext instead.
Things your teammates control count as Things you control for Shining Armor's effects.
Unstable Landfill
Thing
Whenever a card in the discard pile is played, put into play, or put into a player's hand, gain a Garbage Token.
Action: Recycle any three Garbage Tokens to draw a card and return a card from the discard pile to your hand.
Power Bottling Plant
Thing
At the start of each turn, place an Action token on this card. Once per turn you may sacrifice any number of Action tokens. If you do, the Action cost of the next activated ability you use this turn is lowered by the number of tokens sacrificed this way, to a minimum of zero actions.
Token Majority
Action
Gain control of all tokens owned by players who control more tokens than non-token Things.
Eaten Authority
Action
Destroy target Thing, and all Things that do not share any letters in their title with that Thing's title.