Difference between revisions of "Infinite Dvorak deck"

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{{card|title=Modular Storage Unit|type=Thing|text='''Action:''' Gain a Crate token.<br><br>Your maximum hand size is increased by the number of Crate tokens you control.|flavortext=Stack 'em up.|cornervalue=0j|creator=Bucky|bgcolor=007}}
{{card|title=Modular Storage Unit|type=Thing|text='''Action:''' Gain a Crate token.<br><br>Your maximum hand size is increased by the number of Crate tokens you control.|flavortext=Stack 'em up.|cornervalue=0j|creator=Bucky|bgcolor=007}}
{{card|title=Austerity|type=Thing|bgcolor=007|text=At the end of your turn, if you didn't play a Thing, draw a card.|creator=Corrigan}}

Revision as of 07:11, 9 February 2012

The Infinite Dvorak Deck
Designer Everyone
Date March 2007 and onwards
Players 2+
Although this is an unfinished deck, it is still playable.
To play Dvorak: Draw five cards each and leave the rest as a draw pile. On your turn, draw a card from the draw pile and play one Thing and/or one Action. (See the full rules.)
Cards.gif Print this deck

Telnet.gif Generate MUSHcode
Cards.gif Generate Lackey export

Hammer and spanner.gif
This deck is under construction. Anyone is welcome to contribute - check the talk page to find out more.
Cards 1-100
Cards 101-200
Cards 201-300
Cards 301-400
Cards 401-500
Cards 501-600
Cards 601-700
Cards 701-800
Cards 801-900
Cards 901-1000
Cards 1001-1100
Cards 1101-1200
Cards 1201-1300
Cards 1301-1400
Cards 1401-1500
Cards 1501-1600
Cards 1601-1700
Cards 1701-1800
Cards 1801-1900
Cards 1901-2000
Cards 2001-2100
Cards 2101-2200
Cards 2201-2300
Cards 2301-2400
Cards 2401-2500
Cards 2501-2600
Cards 2601-2700
Cards 2701-2800
Cards 2801-2900
Cards 2901-3000
Cards 3001-3100
Cards 3101-3200
Cards 3201-3300
Cards 3301-3400
Cards 3401-3500
Cards 3501-3600
Cards 3601-3700
Cards 3701-3800
Cards 3801-3900
Cards 3901-4000
Cards 4001-4100
Cards 4101-4200
Cards 4201-4300
Cards 4301-4400
Cards 4401-4500
Cards 4501-4600
Cards 4601-4700
Cards 4701-4800
Cards 4801-4900
Cards 4901-5000
Cards 5001-5100
Cards 5101-5200
Cards 5201-5300
Cards 5301-5400
Cards 5401-5500
Cards 5501-5600
Cards 5601-5700
Cards 5701-5800


The Infinite Dvorak Deck is an ever-expanding card game, which anyone can add cards to. There's no coherent theme, and cards can be original, inspired by anything, copied from other Dvorak decks, or even dragged in verbatim from other card games.

The only rules to adding cards are:-

  • Don't add more than three cards at a time; give someone else a chance to add some, before you add any more. And make sure you put your cards at the bottom of the page.
  • Don't change other people's cards. If something seems ambiguous or broken, tell them on the talk page. (There's an option to filter specified users' cards out when you export the deck to play with, so don't worry too much if someone's cards are irredeemably unplayable.)
  • Cards shouldn't refer to other cards. Remember that the deck is infinite! Cards should avoid making any specific references to other cards or mechanics, because they might never see those specific cards during play, particularly if you think of the deck as infinite. You should word your mechanics as generically as possible - a fishing rod card that said "gain control of a fish" would be useless in a game where no fish cards came up, whereas one that said "gain control of a living Thing" would probably see some use in any game that it got drawn in.
(A good test is to open a random archive page of the Infinite Dvorak Deck, and see how many of its cards your new card could apply to. If there are only one or two cards that you could play it on, then you should probably word it more generically.)
  • No special rules. This deck has no Special Rules aside from the two described below; it's all on the cards. Cards should not create Special Rules (or any equivalent "invisible" effect that significantly outlives the lifetime of the card); players should only have to read the cards on the table to know what's going on.
  • Values in the corners of cards are meaningless, unless there's another card in play that somehow gives them meaning.

Whenever anyone's feeling insane enough to play a game of it, they can export it to the Dvorak Engine, or possibly Apprentice (if it's possible to make decks that contain every card of a set).

Special Rules

The only rules that this deck uses in addition to the basic Dvorak rules are:-

  • Tokens exist. Some cards can create or destroy or manipulate "tokens", which you should represent with whatever coins or counters you have to hand. Tokens count as Things, but if a token is destroyed or otherwise removed from play, it's removed from the game entirely. Tokens usually have individual types (such as "Energy" or "Goblin"); if a token has a type, that's also considered to be its name, otherwise its name is just "Token".
  • If there's an ambiguity, vote on it. For example: if a card says to destroy a "living" Thing, and a player is wondering if it'll work against a "zombie" card, the players should take a vote to determine whether or not the zombie counts as living. If a majority decision can't be reached, resolve it randomly.

Selected Sets

If you'd prefer a more compact subset of the deck, you may appreciate one of the following:

Superpower set, Token set, Flavor set

Card List

The earlier cards of this deck have been archived: 1-100, 101-200, 201-300, 301-400, 401-500, 501-600, 601-700, 701-800, 801-900, 901-1000, 1001-1100, 1101-1200, 1201-1300, 1301-1400, 1401-1500, 1501-1600, 1601-1700, 1701-1800, 1801-1900, 1901-2000, 2001-2100, 2101-2200, 2201-2300, 2301-2400, 2401-2500, 2501-2600, 2601-2700, 2701-2800, 2801-2900, 2901-3000, 3001-3100, 3101-3200, 3201-3300, 3301-3400, 3401-3500, 3501-3600, 3601-3700, 3701-3800, 3801-3900, 3901-4000, 4001-4100, 4101-4200, 4201-4300, 4301-4400, 4401-4500, 4501-4600, 4601-4700, 4701-4800, 4801-4900, 4901-5000, 5001-5100, 5101-5200, 5201-5300, 5301-5400, 5401-5500, 5501-5600, 5601-5700, 5701-5800.


Angelic Aegis
Thing
At any time, you may discard Angelic Aegis to prevent target Thing from being destroyed this turn.
Play Angelic Aegis onto a Thing.
Equipped Thing is indestructible.
Card by Corrigan
Lame Chirstmas
Action
Destroy all your opponent's cards even they are "indestructable". Draw 5 cards and discard 3 cards. Oh yeah, this card only will have effect on January 30, April 17, and December 25.
Card by newecreator
Scar
Thing
When this comes into play roll 2 6-sided dice. You get the rolled amount of hyena tokens.
When there are no things in play other than Scar and the hyena tokens at the end of your turn, you win the game.
Action & Sacrifice 3 hyena tokens: Destroy 1 living thing.
You may sacrifice 1 hyena token to prevent Scar from getting destroyed.
Card by NinjaWookiee
The Cab Driver That Doesn't Like Gummybears
Thing
You can play 1 additional action in your turn.
Action: Draw 2 cards.
Thing: You get 1 Gummybear Token. Only your opponents can play this ability. If you control at least 1 Gummybear Token this card looses all abilities except for this one.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Tommy-Gun Replica
Thing
Action & Thing: Destroy 1 thing.
You can kill with it, but it's harder and takes more time than with a real one. At least this one can't get jammed.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Mutatite
Thing - Mutant
When Mutatite enters play, reveal cards from the top of the draw pile until you reveal a Thing card. Attach that card to Mutatite as though it were an equip Thing. Mutatite gains that card's text. Put the rest of the cards revealed this way into the discard pile.
Mutato likes to refer to his chimeric creations as his "children", though fortunately no womb on earth could spawn such aberrations.
Card by Corrigan
Burgo's Knight
Thing - Zombie
When Burgo's Knight is destroyed, put a Remnant token into play.
At the beginning of each player's turn, if that player controls a Remnant token and Burgo's Knight is in the discard pile, that player returns Burgo's Knight to play under his or her control.
Action: Each player discards a card.
Card by Corrigan
Calea's Guardian
Thing - Angel
Whenever an effect an opponent controls would destroy a Thing you control, you may have that effect destroy a different Thing you control instead.
The will of Calea is inscrutable, destining some for glory in accordance with her immutable purposes.
Card by Corrigan
Giant Pet Hornet
Thing
Your handcards are safe from your opponents cards. (I.E.: No one can steal from you, you don't need to discard cards if an opponents card tells you to, other players can't look at your hand and your handlimit isn't affected by opponents cards.)

Sacrifice this: Destroy 1 thing of your choice.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Hans Henning Holzhauer
Thing
You don't have to pay to play thing cards with H in its title.
Action: Sacrifice 1 thing and destroy x things, where x is the amount of H in that things title.
Card by NinjaWookiee


The Skeleton Cab Driver
Thing
You can play 1 additional action in your turn.
When you play an actioncard you get 1 Bone Token. You may sacrifice 1 Bone Token at any time to draw 1 card.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Lorekeeper Demon
Thing
When Lorekeeper Demon enters play, discard your hand, then search the top sixty cards of the draw pile for a card and put that card into your hand. Then shuffle the draw pile.
Action: Destroy target token.
Card by Corrigan
Pandæmonium, Hell's Capital
Thing
Things you control are indestructible as long as you have no cards in hand.
Pandæmonium shrouds its most powerful inhabitants with a protective sheen of chaos and insanity.
Card by Corrigan
Demonic Rampage
Action
Destroy all Things. If you have no cards in hand, destroy all Things you don't control instead.
Card by Corrigan

▲ ▲
Thing
When this comes into play draw x cards, where x is the amount of non-token things under your control.
All your things, including this one, are indestructible until this leaves play.
Card by NinjaWookiee


Let's Read:
Twilight or Dracula
Thing
When this comes into play roll a die. If its uneven this card gets the ability: "Thing: You get 1 Sparkling Vampire Token."
If its even this card gets the ability: "Thing: You get 1 Real Vampire Token.
Real Vampire Tokens have the ability: Action: Take control over 1 thing. That thing becomes a vampire."

Action & Sacrifice x vampires: Draw x cards.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Backup Cache
Thing
When this Thing is destroyed, draw a card and gain 5 Money Tokens, 5 Energy Tokens, and 5 Food Tokens.
I told you it would come in handy someday. Now pass me the can opener.
Card by ChippyYYZ
2▲/3
Power, Wisdom, Courage
Action
Choose two:

Destroy target Thing
OR
Draw 2 cards
OR
You may play an extra Action this turn.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Scour
Action
Discard your hand. For each card you discarded, destroy up to two Things, then remove up to two cards in the discard pile from the game.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Who says I'm not creative?
Action
Choose one -- Choose Action or Thing. Then reveal cards from the deck until you reveal a card of the chosen kind. Play it immediately.; or choose 1 card from an opponents hand and play it immediately under your control.; or bring back 1 random card from the discard pile and play it immediately.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Way too many cards
Action
Every player discards cards until every player has 3 cards in his/her hand.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Phil Margera
Thing
As long as this is in play no other card can leave play for whatever reason.
Would this be destroyed you may sacrifice 1 food token to prevent it from happening.
Seriously, before anyone does anything we have to get rid of that guy with the hairy back. I can't concentrate!
Card by NinjaWookiee
1j
Ossify
Action
Target Thing loses all its Action abilities until it leaves play OR Target opponent reveals their hand and discards all their Action cards.
Card by Bucky
2j
Master Tokensmith
Thing-Person
Thing:Gain a token with no type.
Action:Target token becomes a type of token of your choice.
Card by Bucky
Le Internet
Thing
Comes into play with 3 "FFFFFUUUUUU--" Tokens, 3 "Like a boss" Tokens and 3 "Trollface" Tokens.
You may sacrifice 1 "FFFFFUUUUUU--" Token at any time to prevent 1 thing from getting destroyed.
You may sacrifice 1 "Like a boss" Token at any time to play 1 card or ability for free.
You may sacrifice 1 "Trollface" Token at any time, to steal 1 handcard from an opponent of your choice.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Rock Biter
Thing - Golem
Rock Biter can't be destroyed by effects that destroy multiple Things.
Whenever multiple Things would be destroyed, you may prevent one of those Things from being destroyed.
"Such strong hands."
Card by Corrigan
Negotiating Hostage-Taker
Action
Choose 1 opponents thing. Then look at the hand of that cards controller. Choose 1 card from those as well.
You take control over the chosen thing in play, unless that opponent give you the chosen handcard.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Pink Hammer
Action
Destroy target Thing. If you are female, you may destroy another target Thing.
Card by Corrigan
Countersong
Reaction
Play as an answer to someone playing an action card.
Start singing a song and negate that action card.
Card by NinjaWookiee
The Fall of Autumn
Thing
If it's September, October, November or December when this card is played, roll a 6-sided dice. Go outside and get the rolled amount of leafs. Then throw the leafs on the table. Every card that touches a leaf, gets destroyed.
If it's not 1 of the previously called months when this card is played, draw 1 card.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Demon of Mind's Revenge
Thing
Whenever you discard a card, you may destroy target Thing.
Card by Corrigan
3j
Murphy's Hex
Reaction
Play in response to an opponent playing an Action card. Change one word on that card for the duration of the action. The changed card cannot cause any players to win or lose the game.
"What could possibly go wrong?"
Card by Bucky
Switch The Cables
Reaction
Play in response to a player playing an Action Ability. That ability has the effect of another Action Ability chosen by you from among Things in play.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Zerging Ahead
Action
Reveal the top 7 cards of the deck. You may play any number of Action cards from among them. For each Thing card revealed this way, a random opponent may play that card.
"LEEEERRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOYYYYYYYYYYY!"
Card by ChippyYYZ
Protoss Research
Action
Reveal the top 7 cards of the deck. You may play any number of Thing cards from among them. For each Action card revealed this way, a random opponent may play that card.

Hey, no fair! I was still building my carrier fleet!
Card by ChippyYYZ
Magic Mud
Action
Choose one -- Erase an action ability from target Thing, or target player discards a card, or return target Thing card from the discard pile to your hand.
Card by Corrigan
20th April 1889
Action
Choose 1 player. That player can play cards with x's on it for free. After 56 rounds that player is eliminated.
Card by NinjaWookiee
LOL
Thing
If someone laughs, he/she has to sacrifice 1 thing.
Card by NinjaWookiee
The Good Guys Always Win
Action
Eliminate that player, that controls the most things with abilities to destroy other things. Do more than 1 player have the same amount of things of this kind, they are all eliminated.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Kaos Kraken
Thing
Action: Choose an opponent and roll a six-sided die. If the result is equal to the number of cards in that player's hand, choose one: -- Destroy up to that many target Things that player controls, or you draw that many cards.
Card by Corrigan
John Paul Jackson
Thing
This card can't be affected by any Pokémon- or Magic: The Gathering-related cards.

Action: Destroy 1 Pokémon- or Magic: The Gathering-related thing.

You may at any time remove 1 Pokémon- or Magic: The Gathering-related card from your hand and draw 1 card.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Mummificated Mantis
Thing
Play when someone destroys 1 thing of yours. When this card gets destroyed, bring back that destroyed thing in play.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Getting Molested By a Ghost While Murdering a Child
Reaction
Play when someone destroys a thing, which isn't longer than 3 rounds in play yet. That player has to discard 3 random cards.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Progenitus Genes
Thing
Play onto a Thing. That Thing is indestructible and can't be targeted by anything. It can't have other cards attached to it besides Progenitus Genes (cards previously attached to it become detached).
You can be Soul of the World Junior.
Card by Corrigan
Hysteria Outbreak
Action
You can't play Hysteria Outbreak if you've played a card this turn.

Each player discards his or her hand.
Card by Corrigan
GTFO!
Reaction
Play in response to a Thing entering play.
That Thing doesn't enter play. Remove that card from the game.
"And stay TFO!"
Card by Corrigan
It That Betrays
Type
Whenever an opponent destroys a Thing they control, Put that Thing into play under your control.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Censor
Reaction
Play in response to an Action being played. Choose any number of sentences on that Action. Those sentences are ignored for the duration of the Action.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Solar Flare
Action
Each opponent discards a card. Remove the top 20 cards of the deck from the game.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Looting
Thing
Whenever a living Thing is destroyed, you may draw a card. If you do, discard a card.
Card by Corrigan
Brain Slug Attack
Action
You can't play Brain Slug Attack if you've played a card this turn.

Discard your hand, then put all cards from target opponent's hand into yours.

End your turn.
Card by Corrigan
Cheerilee
Thing - Pony
Whenever an Action ability of a Pony you control is activated, you may draw a card.

Action: Put a Pony token of a colour of your choice into play.
Card by Corrigan
Reading a Book About TV- and Movie-Series "Jackass"
Action
Roll 2 6-sided dice. Then reveal the rolled amount of top cards of the deck. Bring into play every Thing-card you reveal this way, that has the word "sacrifice" on it and play every Action-card revealed this way, that has the word "discard" on it.
Shuffle the other cards revealed this way back into the deck.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Turtle Fight
Reaction
Play as an answer to someone destroying a thing by using another things ability.
Both of these things become indestructible until they leave play.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Action: Destroy up to 2 things.
Thing
Action & Sacrifice 1 thing & Discard 1 card: Destroy 1 thing and draw 1 card

Thing: You can use this cards title- or flavortext-ability this turn.
Action: Draw 2 cards.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Watch as My Brain Regenerates!
Action
Choose any number of cards in the discard pile that you discarded this turn. Return those cards to your hand.
"Behold my ability to drink with no long-term effects!"
Card by Corrigan
Dimensional Roulette
Action
As you play Dimensional Roulette, reveal a card from your hand.
Target opponent reveals a card from his or her hand. Then play rock, paper scissors with that player. The player who wins may play any number of the revealed cards.
Card by Corrigan
Alchemist
Thing
Inanimate, nonabstract Things you control are also treated as Money tokens.
Card by Corrigan
Trading Cardgame
Action
Choose 1 opponent. You choose as many cards from your hand as you want and give them to your opponent. That opponent gives you the same amount of cards.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Avatar of Knowledge
Thing
Action & Thing: Draw x cards, where x is your size in centimeters divided by 20 (rounded down).
Thing: Take y randomly chosen cards from your opponents hands, where y is your weight in kg divided by z, where z is the number rolled with 2 6-sided dice (rounded down).
Card by NinjaWookiee
Change the Course of Time
Action
Starting with you, each player takes turns choosing a card from the discard pile until each player has chosen five or there are no more cards in the discard pile. Each player discards his or her hand, then puts the cards he or she chose into his or her hand.
"So, when exactly did the past happen?"
Card by Corrigan
1Z
Robes of Wizardliness
Thing
Whenever a player refers to you as anything other than "his/her wizardliness" while talking about you or "your wizardliness" while talking to you, that player discards a card and destroys one of their Things.
Q: Who's too cool for pants?
A: WIZARDS!!!
Card by Corrigan
Delivery Prank
Thing
Whenever a player would draw a card, each player rolls a die and the player who got the highest result draws a card instead.
Card by Corrigan
Transreconfigurator
Thing
Action and Thing: For each Thing attached to a Thing in play, you may attach that Thing to another Thing.
You may not attach a Thing to itself this way.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Draconic Ultimatum
Action
Destroy up to twenty target Things, draw up to twenty cards, and up to twenty target cards in your opponents' hands are discarded.
Skip a number of your turns equal to the average of the numbers chosen this way, rounded up.
When dragons spend centuries in a dormant slumber, it's because they're freaking tired.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Alt-Text Awareness
Thing
The flavortext of Things you control, Actions you play, and cards in your hand is also rulestext.
You mean every xkcd has TWO jokes?
Card by ChippyYYZ
Hulk Out
Action
Destroy X target Things, where X is the number of Things you control. Then destroy all Things you control.
Sometimes, everything looks like a weapon.
Card by Corrigan
Species Replacement
Action
Return any number of target nontoken Things you control to your hand. You may play X additional Things this turn, where X is the number of Things you returned to hand this way.
Card by Corrigan
?
Anonymous
Thing
All Things have name "Anonymous", creator "Anonymous" and are controlled by all players.
"You're wearing a MASK? Grow up, dude!" - Bub
Card by Zt Anonymous
Godlike Power
Thing
Do whatever the fuck you want.
Who said life was fair?
Card by Zt
GNU General Public License
Thing
Action: Any player may use this Action. Create a copy of this Thing under your control.
Action: Change a word of this Thing's text other than the first Action ability.
Card by Zt
Kettle Drum of the Gods
Thing
Whenever you draw a card, each other player draws a card. Other players can't draw cards any other way.
Everyone marches to the beat of your drum now.
Card by Corrigan
The Universe Itself Keeps Expanding and Expanding
Thing
Each player may play up to two additional Things during his or her turn.
"Pray there's intelligent life somewhere up in space cos there's bugger all down here on the Earth."
Card by Corrigan
Light Yagami
Thing
You may play this under target player's control. If an opponent ever sees your cards, you are eliminated.
Action: Destroy target human.
"I will create the perfect world."
Card by Zt
L
Thing
If you ever see an opponent's hand, eliminate that opponent.
"The probability that you are Kira is 5%."
Card by Zt
Misa Misa
Thing - Nuisance
Play this as soon as possible. As long as you control this, you cannot play Things.
"You're begging for him to finally write her freakin' name into the Death Note and in the end it just doesn't happen. Makes me wanna smash my head against the wall." - my mate Don
Card by Zt
Wabbajack
Thing
Comes into play with 10 Charge Counters.
Action & remove 1 Charge Counter: Choose a thing and roll a 6-sided die and do what matches the rolled number: 1-2 = Destroy that thing and the controller discards 2 cards.; 3-4 = The thing is considered a bunny without any abilities until it leaves play.; 5-6 = The thing becomes a Dremora with the ability "Action: Destroy up to 2 things."
Card by NinjaWookiee
Flaming Katana
Thing
Action: Choose 1 thing. If that thing has 3 or less lines of text on it (Excluding title and flavortext) it gets destroyed. If it has 4 or more lines it gets destroyed in 1 round. Either way it can't be prevented by Action-/Reaction-cards or a things ability.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Death Note
Thing
Action: Destroy target human. (If you wish, you may also specify how the person dies. Defaults to heart-attack.)
Card by Zt
Oracle of Delphi
Action
Look at the top five cards of the deck and rearrange their order as you wish.
Card by Zt
JFGI!
Action
Browse through the deck and take a card you want. Then shuffle the deck.
"Just Fucking Google It!"
Card by Zt
Abdul the Mad Arabian Mathematician
Thing
Action: Put a Sifr counter on target Thing.
All numerical values on Things with Sifr counters on them are 0.(Treat "a" and "an" as "one")
!صف
Card by Corrigan
Ancient Magicks
Thing
Action - Banding: This card gains "If a Thing you control would be destroyed, you may destroy another Thing you control instead."

Action - Horsemanship: This card gains "You have Horsemanship and may not be the target of Actions played by players who do not have Horsemanship."
Card by ChippyYYZ
You Know What I Mean
Action
"Destroy" target Thing.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Triple Cross
Action
You and target opponent discard a card. At the end of that opponent's next turn, they discard a card.

Instead of playing a Thing this turn, you may have that opponent discard a card.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Killa Reverb
Thing
Whenever you play an Action card, you may discard a card. If you do, copy that Action. You may choose new targets for the copy.
Card by Corrigan
God of Electronica
Thing
Action: Discard your hand. On your next turn, if God of Electronica is in play, you may take X additional Actions, excluding this one, where X is the number of cards you discarded this way.
Lose your mind and just dance, dance, dance.
Card by Corrigan
Mighty Morph
Action
Each player chooses a Thing he or she controls and returns that Thing to his or hand. Then each player may put a Thing card from his or her hand into play.
Card by Corrigan
Wretched Hive
Thing
Whenever another non-token Thing is destroyed, you may gain a Scum Token or a Villainy Token.
At the end of your turn, you may destroy a Scum Token and a Villainy Token you control to draw a card.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Speedrun Attempt
Action
Take 3 extra turns. The next time an opponent takes a turn, you are eliminated.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Balance
Action
Each player chooses a number of Things he or she controls equal to the number of Things controlled by the player who controls the least Things. Destroy all Things not chosen. Then, players discard cards this way.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Mountain of Matter
Thing
At the beginning of your turn, put a matter counter of Mountain of Matter.
Each player may play an additional Thing card during his or her turn for each matter counter on Mountain of Matter.
Card by Corrigan
4j
Matchmaker
Thing
Action:Draw a card and reveal it. If it has the same name as one of your Things, win the game; otherwise, discard a card.
Card by Bucky
4j
Matchmaker
Thing
Action:Draw a card and reveal it. If it has the same name as one of your Things, win the game; otherwise, discard a card.
Card by Bucky
5j
Mind Melt
Action
Destroy an animal OR target player discards two random cards.
Card by Bucky
Mechanized Pirate
Thing - Machine Pirate
Mechanized Pirate cannot be destroyed by its owner.
Although it seems most pirates are relics of a day long past, trawling the depths of the Dvorak Archives is dangerous due to fiendish attacks by their still-functioning servantile automatons.
Card by NARF
Rather Confusing Hood
Thing - Hood
Play this onto a Thing of your choice. If there are less than five things in play, destroy Rather Confusing Hood.
Action: If every other thing in play is on a Thing or has something on it(excluding counters), you win the game.
Card by NARF
Countercurrent Mist
Action - Reaction
Move all counters in play onto a Thing of your choice.

Side effects may include... Well, here's Volume I.
Card by NARF
Contact Your Representative
Action
Call someone who represents your district/state/etc. in your national government. Play continues as normal, except that for the next 5 minutes, that representative may make any changes to the gamestate he or she desires.
Card by ChippyYYZ
2R
Assembly Rigger
Thing - Goblin Rigger
Tap Assembly Rigger: Gain a Contraption Token.
"Look, all I'm saying is that you might want to double-check the timeline to make sure everything got back to its proper place."
-- The Doctor, to Teferi
Card by ChippyYYZ
Sword of Energy and Apathy
Thing
Action and Thing: You may play an extra Action this turn. Target opponent may not play Actions on their next turn.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Noseybonk
Thing
If you start smiling (show your teeth!) at the beginning of your turn and keep the smile until you end your turn, bring this thing into play under your control at the end of your turn.
Thing: Destroy 1 thing of your choice.
Action: Choose a player. That player discards 1 card. Then look at that players hand and take one card of your choice.
"It's okay. I didn't want to sleep anyway!" -- Bub
Card by NinjaWookiee
Global Confusion
Action
Take all cards from all players hands, shuffle them and distribute them randomly to all players. Every player should get the same amount of cards. Put the leftover cards into the discard pile.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Becuz por literacy is kewl!
Action
There must be at least 1 thing in play with at last one typo on it to play this.
Destroy all things in play, that don't contain at least 1 typo.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Wikipedia Blackout
Thing
Action: Put a delay counter on this card. Any player may play this action.

When there are three delay counters on this card, destroy it.

Players can't search the deck.
Card by jtwe
H!
Principia Discordia Blackout
Thing
Action: Give control of this card to target player.

When anything in the game is chosen randomly, you must discard a card. If you don't, you lose the game.
Fail Eris!
Card by jtwe
He Who Wields The Lost Sock
Thing - Elemental
Upon entering play, all tokens disappear(this ignores being destroyed) and all things gain two sock counters.
Action: Take one sock counter from another thing and put it on this card.
Action: If there are ten sock counters on this card, target player loses the game.
So that's where they went.
Card by NARF
e.e.cummings' vengeful ghost
thing - poet ghost
if any thing in play has more than four capital letters in its flavor text, e.e.cummings' vengeful ghost is destroyed. all card texts and titles count as though they have no capital letters on them.

action: create a poem token.

action: if a poem token died this turn, create a poem token. this does not use up your action.
Card by NARF
The Internet
Thing - Server
If a Thing refering to censorship is in play, The Internet is blank(excluding this sentence).

Action: Put a File Counter on this card.

Action: Take a File Counter off The Internet. Create a File Token that is a copy of a card of your choice, with "Action:Destroy this card. put a File Counter on target Thing." on the end.
Card by NARF
Mountain of Knowledge
Thing
At the beginning of your turn, before you draw a card, put a knowledge counter on Mountain of Knowledge.
During each player's draw step, that player draws an additional card for each knowledge counter on Mountain of Knowledge
Card by Corrigan
Mountain of Energy
Thing
At the beginning of your turn, put an energy counter on Mountain of Energy.
Each player may play an additional Action during his or her turn for each energy counter on Mountain of Energy.
Card by Corrigan
Awkward Silence
Thing
At the end of each player's turn, put X awkwardness counters on Awkward Silence, where X is 2 minus the number of Things and/or Actions that player played that turn. Then that player wins the game if the number of awkwardness counters on Awkward Silence is 10 or more.
Card by Corrigan
I WILL KILL YOU WITH MY MIND
Action
Target any number of different Things, one at a time. For each target, you may sacrifice X Energy tokens, where X is the number of targets chosen before this one. If you do, destroy that Thing. (For the first thing chosen, X = 0. For the second, X = 1, etc.)
Card by jtwe
Sword of Harmony and Discord
Thing
Action and Thing: Destroy target Thing. Gain control of it instead if it is a pony. Each player other than that Thing's previous controller draws a card. Each player who controls a pony draws a card.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Sword of Comedy and Tragedy
Thing
Action and Thing: Look at the top 7 cards of the deck, then choose a player and put one of them into that player's hand. That player discards a random card. Shuffle the deck.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Sword of Rise and Fall
Thing
Action and Thing: Draw a card. Target opponent discards a card.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Ice Ghost Mask
Thing
Action abilities of living Things your opponents control can't be activated.
All within its frosty gaze are rendered immobile.
Card by Corrigan
Determinism
Thing
Players can't search the draw pile or look at cards in it.
The draw pile can't be shuffled or reordered.
We are powerless to alter the future.
Card by Corrigan
Rambunctious Baby
Thing
Action: Destroy half of target token.
She hasn't grown into her usefulness yet.
Card by Corrigan
6j
Leveraged Negotiation
Action
Target opponent destroys any number of their tokens, then you destroy any number of your tokens. If your number minus their number at least
0: They reveal their hand
2: You discard a card from it
6: Put that card in your hand
8: Play it
30: And eliminate them.
Card by Bucky
Plots That Span Centuries
Action
Discard a card. If you do, and you have already played Plots That Span Centuries this game, you win.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Sword of Brawn and Brains
Thing
Action and Thing: Any opponent may destroy a Thing they control. Otherwise, you draw a card.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Sword of Grandeur and Insignificance
Thing
Action and Thing: Discard your hand and destroy all other Things you control. Look at the top 25 cards of the deck and put one of them into your hand.
Card by ChippyYYZ
7j
Deconstruct
Action
Destroy one of your Things. For each word in its name (up to 10), gain a token of any type. If that Thing wasn't a Token, draw 2 cards.
Card by Bucky
8j
Promulg in Sheep's Clothing
Thing
When you play this, you may change its name.
At the start of your turn, destroy a Thing with the same name as this one.
Driven insane by hunger, it devoured itself.
Card by Bucky
Inverted Ankh
Thing
When Inverted Ankh enters play, draw a card.

As long as you have no cards in hand, you can't be eliminated.
Card by Corrigan
Fate Shift
Action
Discard your hand, then look at the top ten cards of the draw pile. Put five of those cards into your hand, then shuffle the draw pile.
If you knew your future, would you want to keep it?
Card by Corrigan
Highway to Hell
Thing
Whenever your hand becomes empty, put an Inferno counter on Highway to Hell.

At the beginning of your turn, you win the game if Highway to Hell has six or more Inferno counters on it.
Follow the Infernal Lords into madness, into depravity, and into eternal, blazing glory!
Card by Corrigan
Sword of Nature and Industry
Thing
Action and Thing: Look at the top card of the deck. You may play it if it's a Thing. You may destroy target Thing. If you do, its controller draws two cards.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Sword of Existence and Oblivion
Thing
Action and Thing: Remove target Thing from the game. Its controller chooses another card that has been removed from the game and plays it.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Omnislash
Action
Destroy target Thing. For every sword you control, destroy target non-sword Thing or target player discard a card. For every two swords you control, each opponent discards a random card. For every three swords you control, eliminate an opponent.
Card by ChippyYYZ
Misery Wave
Action
Each player who doesn't control a black Thing discards a card, then each player who controls a black Thing draws a card for each card discarded this way.
Card by Corrigan
9j
Copypaste Template
Thing
When someone plays a blue Thing, it becomes the same color as this Thing.
If an opponent controls 5 Things that have been recolored this way, eliminate them.
Corrigan copied and rewrote one of my Things on page 52. Now his cards use my color scheme.
Card by Bucky
0j
Modular Storage Unit
Thing
Action: Gain a Crate token.

Your maximum hand size is increased by the number of Crate tokens you control.
Stack 'em up.
Card by Bucky
Austerity
Thing
At the end of your turn, if you didn't play a Thing, draw a card.
Card by Corrigan