User:NinjaWookiee

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My name is NinjaWookiee... obviously...

I'm German and just love this fucking cardgame.

My Dvorak story

As kid me and a friend once made a yu-gi-oh-like cardgame ourselves by cutting out images of magazines and add abilities and stuff to it. We had a deck of over 100 cards and one day we through it away. Why? Because we were goddamn fucking idiot kids.

Since then we always wanted to make an own simple card game again, but we hate yu-gi-oh nowadays and didn't wanted to do something like that. Then one day I found Dvorak through pure luck by using StumpleUpon.com. I was actually blown away by the idea and the next weekend me and 2 friends started to make cards. First game was played with a deck out of 63 random cards mostly just based on things we like or inside jokes between us. As far as I remember it the first game alone was approximately 5 hours long!!! But it was worth it. 2 games later the deck is over 100 cards big. NO SHIT! We really thought about making a new separate deck but we decided "Fuck it! Let's just always make new cards and create one giant frustrating and time-consuming, but also entertaining deck. That's why we always make new cards if we have new ideas (And right now they come like flies on shit) and add the cards in between the games. We had 2 games, which just went for 1 hour or so. But all of the other were over 3, sometimes 5 hours long. It's hard, but it's fun.

We call Dvorak the coolest and most creative cardgame ever done but also the most upsetting and time-consuming game of all time. But that's probably just because of our cards. Anyways, we love Dvorak and our deck will expand forever.

Someday we wanna buy a golden briefcase and only we 3 now the code to open it. We will give everything to not loose any card and always keep it. If we're old we will get out the old selfmade cards and laugh our ass off at what bullshit we made as teenagers. And when we die, we will give it to our kids telling them to add new cards and so on.

Maybe I'm gonna put our deck in here, but that would be almost as time-consuming and upsetting as playing the game itself. There are already over 100 cards in our deck and we're already making new ones!

Our own dvorak deck

Our Infinite Deck
Designer NinjaWookiee, NinjaWarrior, Wolfblut
Date July 2011 - onward
Players 2+
Although this is an unfinished deck, it is still playable.
To play Dvorak: Draw five cards each and leave the rest as a draw pile. On your turn, draw a card from the draw pile and play one Thing and/or one Action. (See the full rules.)
Cards.gif Print this deck

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This deck is locked. Further cards should not be added - leave feedback on the talk page.

Alright I'm gonna start dumping our dvorak deck. I hope I'm translating everything right (from German to English). If you don't understand some thing it's probably because it's based on inside jokes, but you can always ask if you're curious. Some of them are based on cards I found here on this wiki. I try to add the right creator to them. And the most important thing: DON'T TAKE IT SERIOUSLY!

The colors intend the colors of the text and pics on the cards. (Because we all used ballpens to make them they're alle black or blue.) This may get important later.

All questions you may have will be answered on my discussion/talk page.

Special Rules

1. A zombie/undead counts as T-Virus infected and as unholy.

2. T-Virus infected things can't be infected by the T-Virus again.

3. If there is ambiguity all players vote for what to happen.

4. "To steal a card" always means to look at a chosen players hand and take the called amount of cards of your choice.

5. If all cards in the deck are drawn so there is no draw pile anymore, shuffle the discard pile and make it the new draw pile.

6. If you listen to music while playing you may add any version of "Lugias Song" to the playlist. If "Lugias Song" is playing the first player that notices it may search the deck for "Lugia" and put it under his/her control into play. (Song Examples: LucaGirl94's Deep Remix and DJ The Fishead's Trance Remix)

7. "Shedinja" is never in the deck/draw pile. It needs to be reachable tho.

8. If you search the deck for a card for whatever reason, you are not allowed to take a card that allows you to search the deck for a card.

There are 358 cards right now.


The Cards

The earlier cards of our deck have been archived: 1-100, 101-200, 201-300
Harpy
Action
Action: Take control over 1 thing of your choice. Destroy that thing after 3 rounds.
Card by Wolfblut
Harpy
Action
Action: Take control over 1 thing of your choice. Destroy that thing after 3 rounds.
Card by Wolfblut
Harpy
Action
Action: Take control over 1 thing of your choice. Destroy that thing after 3 rounds.
Card by Wolfblut
Useless
Action
You get 5 useless tokens. You can't sacrifice those for any reason.
Card by Wolfblut
Rubber
Thing
All your things which don't have any action- or thing-ability get: Action: Destroy 1 thing.
Card by Wolfblut
Mole
Reaction
Play as an answer to 1 thing getting destroyed. Destroy 5 other things of your choice instead.
Card by Wolfblut
Salesman
Thing
Search the deck for Market or Supermarket and bring it into play under your control.
X for an U
Card by Wolfblut
Longcat
Thing
This is undestructible. If you control all 3 parts of Longcat you win the game.
Card by Wolfblut
Longcat
Thing
This is undestructible. If you control all 3 parts of Longcat you win the game.
Card by Wolfblut
Longcat
Thing
This is undestructible. If you control all 3 parts of Longcat you win the game.
Card by Wolfblut
Catgirl
Action
Thing & Action: 1 thing of your choice becomes a catgirl. You gain control over that thing. If you control 5 or more catgirls you win the game.
Card by Wolfblut
Massproduction
Action
Play 1 additional thing.
Card by Wolfblut
Dying giraffe
Thing
Sacrifice this to prevent 1 thing from getting destroyed.
Card by Wolfblut
Splitting the atoms
Action
You get 10 splitted atom tokens with the ability: Action: Sacrifice 2 splitted atoms tokens and 1 thing of your choice becomes 1 atom.
Card by Wolfblut
Spermwhale
Action
Choose 5 words and exchange them with other words. Every player now has to refer to the new words. (For example you say "Instead of the word card we say lion now!" Then everyone has to say lion instead of card.)
Does someone not use the new words sacrifices all of his/her things, discards all handcards and skips his/her next turn.
'I guess I should start giving things names... Ground! That's it. I call it ground! I wonder if it's nice to me." BOOM! --Spermwhale from "The Hitchiker's Guide To The Galaxy
Card by NinjaWarrior
Solicitor
Thing
You have to play this if you can.
You can't play things as long as you control Solicitor.
"You want a vacuum cleaner!" - "No." - "Yes you do." - "No." - "It can suck things up." - "Yeah!!"
Card by Wolfblut
Backbreaker
Action
Destroy 1 thing.
Card by Wolfblut
To be in a generous mood
Action
Choose -- You draw 1 card; or you draw 4 cards and your opponents draw 2 cards.
Card by Wolfblut
Don't dally!
Reaction
If you have this card in your hand count the seconds it takes for someone to play his/her turn. Is someones turn longer than 60 seconds call the title of this card out loud and play it. The opponents turn gets aborted immediately and it's your turn now.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Artifact
Thing
Put 1 counter on artifact every 3 rounds. There can be up to 3 counters on this card.
Sacrifice 1 counter to destroy 1 thing.
Thing: Artifact is undestructible for 1 round.
Card by Wolfblut
Wig Factory
Thing
Things with wig counters are indestructible.
Thing: Put 1 wig counter on 1 living thing of your choice.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Isle of the Damned
Thing
When it comes into play you get 3 cannibal tokens which have the abilities: "Action: Rape 1 thing of your choice.
Thing & Sacrifice it: Destroy 1 thing of your choice."
Does this card get destroyed, sacrifice all cannibal tokens.

(Raping means taking control over a thing and destroying it after 3 rounds)
Card by NinjaWookiee
Jack Steele
Thing
Everytime you are destroying a thing, you may destroy 1 additional thing of your choice.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Billy
Thing
Billy can only be destroyed by getting raped.
If Billy gets raped you may draw up to 3 cards before that opponent takes control over Billy.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Iguana-Sperm-Sauce
Thing
Sacrifice this: Choose -- Prevent 1 thing from getting destroyed; or draw 3 cards; or play 1 action card; or play 1 thing card.
Card by NinjaWookiee
Fax
Action
Give someone 1 of your handcards.
Card by Wolfblut
Tits
Thing
Thing & Action: 1 player of your choice skips his/her next turn.
Card by Wolfblut
Paranoia
Thing
Choose 1 player. For the next 2 rounds only that player can be the target of anything.
Card by Wolfblut
Boost
Thing
Play up to 3 additional actions.
Card by Wolfblut
Pointless
Thing
Card by Wolfblut
Shield
Reaction
If a thing would get destroyed, prevent it.
Card by Wolfblut
Suzumiya Haruhi
Thing
Counts as player. This card is indestructible and no one can take control over it. When it gets removed from the game, shuffle it back into the deck instead.
Card by Wolfblut
Supermarket
Thing
To play this you have to discard your entire handcards.
Every player draws 5 instead of 1 card.
Card by Wolfblut
Stop
Thing
Play as an answer to someone playing an action.
That players turn gets interrupted and you do your turn immediately. After your turn that other player continues right were he left off.
Card by Wolfblut
Petunia
Thing
Action: Search for an already played action card in the discard pile and play it without paying it.
Oh no, not again.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Nyan-Cat
Thing
At the beginning of your turn put 1 rainbowcounter on this card. If there are 5 or more rainbowcounter on Nyan-Cat you win the game.
Sacrifice 2 rainbowcounter to prevent Nyan-Cat from getting destroyed or from going under another players control.
Card by Wolfblut
The time of the colors is over!
Action
All not-black cards go back to their controllers hands.
So who says yellow wins?
Card by NinjaWookiee
Marvin, the manic-depressive robot
Thing
Thing: 1 thing of your choice becomes depressive which means, it can't be used by its controller, until that card gets destroyed.
"I talked to the boardcomputer." - "So?" - "He hates me."
Card by NinjaWookiee
Harpy Nest
Thing
Search the deck/discard pile for 1 Harpy and put it in play under your control.
Everytime a Harpy uses its Action ability put a counter on Harpy Nest. If there are 10 or more counters on Harpy Nest, you win the game.
Card by Wolfblut
Diarrhea
Action
3 cards of your choice are considered blank until they leave play.
Card by Wolfblut
Human
Thing
This is a human and can't become anything else.
Card by Wolfblut
Beelzebub, King of the Flies
Thing
When it comes in play you get 6 fly tokens with the ability: "If a thing would be destroyed you can sacrifice 1 fly to prevent it from getting destroyed. You take control over it and destroy it after 3 rounds."
Thing: Create 1 fly token.
Card by Wolfblut
Amnesia
Action
All players discard all cards.
Card by Wolfblut
Dying slowly
Action
All things get destroyed in 5 rounds.
Card by Wolfblut
Converter
Thing
Thing: Play an action.
Action: Play a thing.
Card by Wolfblut
Death Negotiations
Thing
If a thing gets destroyed every player draws 1 card.
Card by Wolfblut
ADHS
Reaction
You can play this anytime. It's immediately your turn.
Card by Wolfblut
Egomaniac
Thing
All positive effects have to target Egomaniac.
Card by Wolfblut
Psychic
Thing
Thing: Draw a card.
Action: Look at the top card.
Card by Wolfblut
Lord Marshal
Thing - Necromonger
Can only be destroyed by Riddick. Can't be removed from the game. Can't be affected by the T-Virus. Can't be played in the first round of the game.
Thing:Take control over 1 thing of your choice. It becomes a Necromonger.
Are all things in play Necromonger you win the game. (The player that destroys/controls Lord Marshal controls all Necromonger.)
Card by NinjaWarrior
The Angle Gun
Action
1 thing of your choice exchanges its ability with the ability of another thing of your choice.
I understand that, honey.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Pub
Thing
All things in play get the ability: Action: Put a counter on Pub. The thing that used this ability can't use an action ability in its controllers next turn.
You win the game, if there are 5 or more counters on Pub.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Pizza Delivery
Reaction
You can play this anytime. It's your turn immediately.
Card by Wolfblut
Mass Resurrection
Action
Bring all things from the discard pile into play. Every player becomes the same amount of randomly chosen things.
Cards with which players could win stay in the discard pile. The things that came in play this way count as zombies.
Card by Wolfblut
Chicken with human arms
Thing
At the beginning of your turn steal 1 card from a player of your choice.
Inspired by YouTuber jonLajoie
Card by NinjaWarrior
Haggler
Thing
Every player draws at the beginning of his/her turn 3 cards and discards 2 cards.
Card by Wolfblut
Firestorm
Action
For the next 5 rounds everytime a player of your choice plays a thing, destroy that thing.
Card by Wolfblut
Predator
Thing
This card is considered removed from the game for your opponents. Comes into play with 3 tokens of every kind: Spear, KI'CTI-PA, Plasmacaster and Mini-Disc.
Sacrifice 1...: ...Spear to destroy 1 thing which just entered play.
...KI'CTI-PA to destroy the least far away opponents thing card from you.
...Plasmacaster to destroy the most far away opponents thing from you.
...Mini-Disc to destroy 1 thing of your choice. There are no exceptions that could prevent this.
Are there no tokens left, sacrifice Predator. Is Predator the only thing left, its considered to be in play for all players now. In 5 rounds you win the game, if Predator doesn't get destroyed.
Card by NinjaWarrior







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