My name is NinjaWookiee... obviously...
I'm German and just love this fucking cardgame.
My Dvorak story
As kid me and a friend once made a yu-gi-oh-like cardgame ourselves by cutting out images of magazines and add abilities and stuff to it. We had a deck of over 100 cards and one day we through it away. Why? Because we were goddamn fucking idiot kids.
Since then we always wanted to make an own simple card game again, but we hate yu-gi-oh nowadays and didn't wanted to do something like that.
Then one day I found Dvorak through pure luck by using StumpleUpon.com.
I was actually blown away by the idea and the next weekend me and 2 friends started to make cards. First game was played with a deck out of 63 random cards mostly just based on things we like or inside jokes between us. As far as I remember it the first game alone was approximately 5 hours long!!! But it was worth it.
2 games later the deck is over 100 cards big. NO SHIT! We really thought about making a new separate deck but we decided "Fuck it! Let's just always make new cards and create one giant frustrating and time-consuming, but also entertaining deck.
That's why we always make new cards if we have new ideas (And right now they come like flies on shit) and add the cards in between the games. We had 2 games, which just went for 1 hour or so. But all of the other were over 3, sometimes 5 hours long. It's hard, but it's fun.
We call Dvorak the coolest and most creative cardgame ever done but also the most upsetting and time-consuming game of all time. But that's probably just because of our cards. Anyways, we love Dvorak and our deck will expand forever.
Someday we wanna buy a golden briefcase and only we 3 now the code to open it. We will give everything to not loose any card and always keep it.
If we're old we will get out the old selfmade cards and laugh our ass off at what bullshit we made as teenagers. And when we die, we will give it to our kids telling them to add new cards and so on.
Maybe I'm gonna put our deck in here, but that would be almost as time-consuming and upsetting as playing the game itself. There are already over 100 cards in our deck and we're already making new ones!
Our own dvorak deck
Alright I'm gonna start dumping our dvorak deck. I hope I'm translating everything right (from German to English).
If you don't understand some thing it's probably because it's based on inside jokes, but you can always ask if you're curious.
Some of them are based on cards I found here on this wiki. I try to add the right creator to them.
And the most important thing: DON'T TAKE IT SERIOUSLY!
The colors intend the colors of the text and pics on the cards. (Because we all used ballpens to make them they're alle black or blue.) This may get important later.
All questions you may have will be answered on my discussion/talk page.
Special Rules
1. A zombie/undead counts as T-Virus infected and as unholy.
2. T-Virus infected things can't be infected by the T-Virus again.
3. If there is ambiguity all players vote for what to happen.
4. "To steal a card" always means to look at a chosen players hand and take the called amount of cards of your choice.
5. If all cards in the deck are drawn so there is no draw pile anymore, shuffle the discard pile and make it the new draw pile.
6. If you listen to music while playing you may add any version of "Lugias Song" to the playlist. If "Lugias Song" is playing the first player that notices it may search the deck for "Lugia" and put it under his/her control into play. (Song Examples: LucaGirl94's Deep Remix and DJ The Fishead's Trance Remix)
7. "Shedinja" is never in the deck/draw pile. It needs to be reachable tho.
8. If you search the deck for a card for whatever reason, you are not allowed to take a card that allows you to search the deck for a card.
There are 282 cards right now.
The Cards
- The earlier cards of our deck have been archived: 1-100, 101-200,
Cockroach Delivery Service
Thing
Roll a dice if this comes into play.
At 1 and 2: Steal a randomly chosen card of an player of your choice.
At 3 and 4: Steal a card of your choice from a play of your choice.
At 5 and 6: Take a card of your choice from the discard pile and put it in your hand.
Absolver Thrull
Thing
When it comes into play, destroy a thing of your choice. If "Absolver Thrull" gets destroyed choose a thing. If that chosen thing gets destroyed, destroy another thing of your choice.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Confuse Ray
Thing
Comes into play under the control of an player of your choice. For the next 5 rounds the chosen player has to throw a dice at the beginning of his/her turn.
1: Nothing happens.
2: The chosen player skips his turn.
3: Nothing happens.
4: The chosen player discards a card.
5: The chosen player sacrifices a thing except for "Confuse Ray".
6: Nothing happens.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Psyducks Headache
Thing
Sacrifice "Psyducks Headache" in 5 rounds. If you do, destroy 1 thing from every opponent.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Telefalling
Action
If a thing of yours would be destroyed or someone else would take control over it you can play this card and prevent that.
Mario Party 8 Asshole
Thing
Destroy 1 thing of every opponent and steal a card from every opponent. You can add a counter or remove a counter from a card under your control.
Jackass
Thing
If someone discovers that you have "Jackass" on your hand, that player chooses either if you discard all cards or destroy all of your things. "Jackass" can't be played.
If "Jackass" was discovered or would be discarded shuffle it into the deck instead. It can't be discarded if you have to many hand cards.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Nincada
Thing
If you have exactly 5 things for 1 round, sacrifice ""Nincada and put "Shedinja" into play under your control. Doesn't work, if "Shedinja" is already in play.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Shedinja
Thing?
This card is never in the deck. Every time someone plays a pokemon card put a counter on "Shedinja". If there are 6 counter or more on "Shedinja" you win the game. "Shedinja" can only be destroyed by pokemon cards. If someone plays "Toxic" on "Shedinja" it's destroyed immediately. If "Shedinja" gets destroyed, remove it from the game.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Icecold Hand
Thing
There is no hand card maximum for you.
Can he drive a car?
Card by NinjaWarrior
Curse
Action
Sacrifice halve of your things. Curse that many things of your choice. The cursed things get destroyed after 4 rounds. There are no exceptions and it can't be prevented.
Go Haunter, Curse Attack!
Card by NinjaWarrior
Flamethrower
Action
Throw a 6 sided die. If it's an even number, destroy a thing of your choice. If it's an uneven number, a thing of yours gets destroyed in 5 rounds.
Go Caterpie, Flamethrower!
Card by NinjaWarrior
Blunder
Reaction
If someone would play a thing or an action you can play this card. That player has to throw 2 6 sided dice.
2-4: Weapon destroyed (That thing/action gets neutralized)
5-7: Weapon damaged (If that player wants to use the cards ability he/she has to throw a 6 sided die. If it's uneven, he/she can't use the ability this time.)
8-10: Fellow hit (One randomly chosen thing of that player gets destroyed.)
11-12: Fail (That players card gets taken back on his/her hand.)
The black eye sees everything!
Card by NinjaWarrior
7 is definitively more than 3
Thing
You win if you control exactly 7 things and another player controls 3 things.
7 years manufacturer's warranty on the fact, that you win with this card.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Groundhog Day
Action
Choose 1 of your things. That thing gets returned to your hand at the end of your turns. If you don't play that chosen thing in one turn, "Groundhog Day"s effect is disabled.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Gone in 60 seconds
Thing
Play under the control of any players control. You have 1 minute to do your turn. If you don't end your turn in 1 minute, you loose.
Skip your next turn: Put this card under another players control.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Mom, he touched me!
Action
Can't be played.
If one of your opponents touches this card say "Haha" and discard this card. That player skips his/her next 2 turns.
If that player was supposed to steal a card from you, he/she doesn't.
Thievery and rape isn't worth it.Card by NinjaWarrior
Prostitution
Action
A thing of your choice can be put under any players control if that player sacrifices 1 thing.
This line is a synonyme.
Card by NinjaWarrior
The Flea Market Guys
Action
Put as many things as you want from the discard pile in your hand. Discard the same amount of cards.
The good things lie in the basement.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Blizzard
Action
An opponent of your choice becomes frozen and skips his/her next 3 turns. That opponent can't be the target for any things abilities or actions as long as he/she is frozen.
Go Spheal, blizzard attack!
Card by NinjaWarrior
PP Up
Action
Search the deck for a pokemon card and put it in your hand.
Just the best for your pokemon!
Card by NinjaWarrior
Revive
Action
Search the discard pile for a pokemon thing card and put it in your hand.
Your pokemon has no energy left? - Yes.
Your pokemon is'nt dead but you want to revive it anyway? - Yes.
Well then just go to Sister Joy for free. - No.Card by NinjaWarrior
Delibird
Thing
At the beginning of your turn, choose a player. That player has to throw a 6 sided die.
That player...
1: ...draws an additional card at the beginning of..
2: ...can't play a thing in...
3: ...can't play an action in...
4: ...can play an additional thing and an additional action in...
5: ...skips...
6: ...doesn't draw any cards in...
...his/her next turn.
A present for you. But it's NOT a mogwai!Card by NinjaWarrior
The ordinary body part collecting janitor
Thing
Action: Choose a things ability. That things looses the chosen ability. Put 1 counter on "The ordinary body part collecting janitor". If there are 5 counter or more on it and on "Pro Killer" as well search the deck for "Parking Garage" and put it into your hand.
And an ordinary day.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Pro Killer
Thing
Thing: Destroy a thing of your choice. It can't be prevented. Put a counter on "Pro Killer". If there are 5 counter or more on it and on "The ordinary body part collecting janitor" as well search the deck for "Parking Garage" and put it into your hand.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Parking Garage
Thing
You have to sacrifice "Pro Killer" and "The ordinary body collecting janitor" to play this card. At the beginning of your turn choose an opponent and say a card title. If that player has the called card in his/her hand put 1 counter on "Parking Garage". If there are 5 counters on "Parking Garage", you win the game.
"Lifestyle". Know your opponents.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Max Revive
Action
Put 1 thing of your choice back in the game from the discard pile. If it's a pokemon card, put "Max Revive" back in your hand.
A: Uhm, we have a question. Is it right, that you have to insert it into the rectum?
B: Yep, that's right.
Totally new! Max Revive!
And to make sure you buy this from us, we scattered them all over the world!Card by NinjaWarrior
HP Up
Reaction
If a thing of yours would be destroyed you can play this card to prevent it. If it was a pokemon card you saved, take "HP Up" back in your hand.
Treat your pokemon with respect. Get 'em up!
Card by NinjaWarrior
Thunder
Action
An opponent of your turn is paralyzed. At the beginning of that players next 5 turns, he/she has to throw a 6 sided die. If it's an even number he has to skip that turn.
Go Elektross, thunder attack!
Card by NinjaWarrior
Butterfly Effect
Thing
Indestructible.
If a thing gets destroyed all cards in the discard pile and in all players hands get shuffled into the deck. All things in play get moved to the right player. At the beginning of their turns every player draws as many cards as he/she had before. It's the turn of the player, who destroyed that thing now.
Put "Butterfly Effect" into the discard pile if this happens.
Just one wing beat and...Card by NinjaWarrior
Wayne's World! Party Time! Excellent!
Thing
Sacrifice a thing: Lay an opponents thing of your choice onto this card. You can do this once per turn.
If there lay 6 things on this card you win the game. If "Wayne's World! Party Time! Excellent!" gets destroyed, the players get their things back.
They never get more than 6 viewers.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Wheel of fortune
Thing
A thing of your choice changes its controller at the end of every turn as long as "Wheel of fortune" is in play.
"The peoples luck doesn't lie in the freedom, it lies in the takeover of a duty." - André Gide
Card by NinjaWarrior
The Cleaning Devils
Action
Choose as many things as you want which go back on their controllers hands. Their controllers have to discard the same amount of cards.
Hell has to be clean too.
Card by NinjaWarrior
The Chosen One
Thing
Only you can win this game.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Toxic
Action
An opponent of your choice is poisoned for 3 rounds.
At the beginning of that opponents turn he/she has to sacrifice 1 thing or discard 1 card.
You can't sacrifice or discard: "Aids"/"Flame-Swordsman, the travelling whore"/"Jackass"/"Parasite"/"Confuse Ray"/"Gone in 60 seconds"
Go Trubbish, toxic attack!Card by NinjaWarrior
5 dozen eggs
Thing
Card by Wolfblut
Mix the fuck out of 'em
Action
"5 dozen eggs" are considered to be "mixed" now.
Card by Wolfblut
PENIS!!!
Action
You have to sacrifice the mixed "5 dozen eggs" to play this card. Destroy all of the opponents things, ignoring indestructibility.
Card by Wolfblut
Hypnotoad
Thing
Hypnotoad counts as a player.
If Hypnotoad comes into play, all things that are in play right now are now controlled by Hypnotoad.
If Hypnotoad gets destroyed or eliminated from the game, destroy all things which were under its control.
Hypnotoad can't be send back on any hand or removed from the game.
Nobody can't win while Hypnotoad is in play.
All glory to the Hypnotoad!
Dishman
Thing
Thing: Put a saucer, cup, fork, spoon, knife or anything dish related on a thing. That thing is considered blank, it can't be sacrificed, it can't be send back on any hand, it's indestructible and it can't be removed from the game.
Dirty dishes, beware for the Dishman!
Narwhal's Sword
Thing
When Narwhal's Sword enters play, bring 5 Narwhal tokens into play with the ability "If a Narwhal gets destroyed, destroy 1 thing.". If there are no Narwhal tokens left, destroy Narwhal's Sword.
When Narwhal's Sword leaves play, destroy all Narwhal tokens.
Action and Thing: Destroy target Thing.
Gay Zombie Midget Porn
Action
Choose 2 things in play. Those 2 things are additionally considered to be zombies. If one of them gets destroyed, destroy the other too.
Lobo
Thing
"Lobo" is indestructible.
Action: Discard a card and destroy 1 thing of your choice.
It's time to frag!
Shotgun
Thing
"Shotgun" comes into play with 2 ammunition tokens.
Action: Sacrifice 1 ammunition token and destroy 1 thing of your choice.
Skip your next turn: Bring 2 ammunition tokens into play.
Lucid Dream
Action
Look at the hand of an opponent of your choice. Choose up to 2 cards which that opponent has to play at his/her next turn.
You choose everything if the cards call for choices.
The Mask
Thing
Action: Equip 1 thing with "The Mask". The equipped thing now is indestructible and gets the ability: "Thing: Destroy a thing."
Sssssmokin'!
Glitch in the Matrix
Action
All things in play move to the right. Everyone gives his hand cards to the player on his/her left.
Those goddamn bugs.
Spider-Man
Thing
If "Spider" is in play, when this comes into play, take control over it.
Thing: 1 thing of your choice is considered "cocooned". "Cocooned" things can't use abilities.
Thing: Search the deck for "Spider" and bring it into play under your control.
Dirty dishes, beware for the Dishman!
Lugia
Thing
When "Lugia" comes into play take control over 1 thing from every opponent. When "Lugia" gets destroyed/sacrificed, those things go back under their former players control.
If "Lugia" moves to the discard pile shuffle it in the deck.
Special Rule if you listen to music while playing: If "Lugias Song" is playing the first player that notices it may search the deck for "Lugia" and put it under his/her control into play.
Did you see Pokémon 2? Lugia truly is Jesus as a pokemon.
Running against the open door
Reaction
Play as an answer to someone winning the game. Destroy the winning key card and 1 additional thing of your choice from that player.
If the key card is indestructible move it to its controllers hand.
Raptor Jesus
Thing
Bring 3 "Holy Raptor" tokens into play.
Sacrifice 1 "Holy Raptor" token: Destroy 1 thing. (Use this ability not more than once per turn.)
Action: Bring 1 "T-Rex" token into play with the ability "Action: Destroy 1 thing.".
Welcome to the High Hoof
Action
Draw 2 cards.
Bring 1 "Book" token into play with the ability: "Your hand maximum is increased by 2."
Kill the Quizmaster
Reaction
Play as a reaction to a reaction or as a reaction to someone asking any question. The player that played the other reaction or asked the question has to discard his/her entire hand.
I want my money NOW!
Random card title here
Thing
Every player writes down 1 word. Those words become this cards title.
2 or more words start with same letter = "Action: Destroy 1 thing"
2 or more words end with same letter = "Thing: Draw 1 card"
2 or more words have same amount of letters = Indestructible
If all of those words start with the same letter, end with the same letter and have the same amount of letters, you win the game.
What the fuck is that?
Shithead
Thing
Every living and/or undead thing of yours gets the ability: "Thing OR Action: Put 1 poop token into play."
Action and Thing: Destroy up to n things of your choice, where n is the amount of poop tokens you have.
Oh shit!
Money rules the world
Thing
Bring 15 Money tokens into play.
Action & Give 5 Money tokens to a player of your choice: Take control over 1 chosen players thing.
Once per round you can give any player control over 1 of your things to get 4 Money tokens.
Master of Day / Master of Night
Thing
From 20 O'clock to 5:59 this card is "Master of Night":
Action: Draw 1 card.
Thing: 1 thing of your choice is indestructible as long as this card is in play.
From 6 O'clock to 19:59 this card is "Master of Day":
Action: Bring 1 card of your choice from the discard pile into play under your control.
Thing: Destroy 1 thing.
Messies
Thing
For every non-token-thing that gets destroyed all opponents get 1 Trash token.
Every player with 1 or more trash tokens can't play Thing-cards.
Every player can discard 1 card anytime to destroy 1 trash token.
S.W.A.T. Team
Action
You get: 4 Red Team Member tokens with the ability: "Sacrifice to save 1 of your things from getting destroyed by an opponent and destroy 1 thing from that opponent." & 4 Blue Team Member tokens with the ability: "Sacrifice to save 1 of your things from getting destroyed by an opponent and choose 1 hand card from that opponent which he/she discards." & 1 Leader token with the ability: "Can't be send back to any hand or removed from the game. If this token gets destroyed/sacrificed, sacrifice all of your Team Member tokens."
Freeze! Put your hands up and get on the floor!
Looks okay
Action
Choose a player. If that player has at least one reaction card on his/her hand, he/she has to say "Looks okay". If he/she does you guess how many reaction cards are on his/her hand. If you guessed right he/she has to reveal all of them and can't play them. (They're considered blank until they leave his hand.)
"So? How does it look?" - "Looks okay." - (Get attacked) - "How does it look now?" - (Short silence) - "Looks okay." -- Riddick
Card by NinjaWarrior
The Dvorak-Gang
Thing
To play this card everyone has to have at least 3 things. Every player chooses 1 thing of his/hers. It's considered to be the leader. If the leader gets destroyed, its controller is eliminated. The leader can only be destroyed, if its controller doesn't have any other things left (except for this card).
If there is just 1 player left that player wins the game.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Summoning Magician
Thing
Sacrifice 1 thing: Play a card that would usually need a special condition or bring back a card that was removed from the game back into play.
Card by NinjaWarrior
The Broken Toaster
Action
Choose 1 thing of yours. 1 player of your choice takes control over the chosen thing.
What's worse than an apocalypse?
Card by NinjaWarrior
Wisdom
Thing
Look at the top 4 deck cards and put them back in any order.
Thing: Look at the top 4 deck cards and put them back in any order.
Instead of drawing 1 card at the beginning of your turn, draw 2 cards and discard 1 card.
Card by NinjaWarrior
...shut the fuck up
Thing
Choose 1 player. If he/she talks, he/she is eliminated. Coughing and sneezing is allowed.
Moaning, grunting etc. isn't allowed.
Card by NinjaWarrior
42
Thing
Start counting everything related to the game. Rounds, destroyed things, played things/actions, drawn cards, etc.
You win if anything happened 42 times.
The answer is: 42! That task was fuckin' hard.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Pacifism
Thing
If no thing is destroyed for 10 rounds you win. That player that destroys "Pacifism" is eliminated.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Who turns the wheel?
Thing
Turn this card 90 degrees around at the beginning of your turn. If this card was turn around 2 times entirely you win the game.
If this card would be destroyed, but isn't right around just turned it 90 degrees back instead.
This isn't even a wheel!
Card by NinjaWarrior
Shit on your hands...
Action
Draw 2 cards.
...can smell good too.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Shit on your hands...
Action
Draw 2 cards.
...can smell good too.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Gods hand
Action
Bring back a card thats removed from the game and put it in your hand.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Gods hand
Action
Bring back a card thats removed from the game and put it in your hand.
Card by NinjaWarrior
Bomb Attack!
Action
Rip a cardlike piece of paper into pieces and throw it into the air. All things that get touched by at least one piece of paper get destroyed.
"Did France invent anything?" - "Uhm... Bomb Attack!"
Card by NinjaWarrior
Stumbling through a maze of wineglasses in a totally dark room
Action
1 opponent of your choice has to throw a die. If that opponent rolls a 1, nothing happens. If else that player has to sacrifice things and/or discard cards until the rolled number is reached.
Giant Ant Queen
Thing
Action: Bring 2 Giant Ant tokens into play.
Thing: Destroy up to x/2 things of your choice and destroy half of your Giant Ant Tokens.
x = Number of your Giant Ant tokens
I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords!
Alien Queen
Thing
At the beginning of your turn you get 1 Xenomorph token with the ability "Action: Destroy 1 opponents thing of your choice.
If this gets destroyed, destroy 4 random things (other than Alien Queen or Xenomorph) and, if it was destroyed by a thing, destroy that subject thing too.".
Alien Queen can not be destroyed, as long as there is at least 1 Xenomorph token in play.
If Alien Queen leaves play, sacrifice all Xenomorph tokens without activating their effects.
T-Rex with a cloaking device
Thing
Action: Destroy 1 thing.
You may discard a card at any time to prevent this thing from leaving play. If you do, this thing can't leave play until your next turn.
Rawr!
Aokigahara
Action
Every player sacrifices 1 of his/her things.
The Thing
Thing
Action: 1 thing of your choice becomes a copy of "The Thing" until it leaves play.
Bring me my battlepants!
Reaction
If a thing of yours should be destroyed prevent it and that thing becomes indestructible instead until it leaves play.
Sparky from LEGO Racers 2
Thing
Action: 1 thing of your choice is considered blank for 3 turns. (If "Sparky from LEGO Racers 2" gets destroyed earlier, the chosen thing isn't considered blank anymore.)
Action&Thing: 1 player of your choice skips his/her next turn. (If "Sparky from LEGO Racers 2" gets destroyed earlier, the chosen player doesn't skip his/her next turn.)
Bloodraven
Thing
Action: Choose 1 thing in the discard pile and bring it back into play under your control. It's considered a zombie now.
Thing: Bring 1 raven token into play with the ability "Action: Sacrifice this thing and destroy 1 thing of your choice."
Andariel
Thing
"Andariel" comes into play with 3 demon tokens with the ability "Action: Sacrifice this thing and destroy 1 thing of your choice."
Action: 1 thing of your choice is considered poisoned and gets destroyed in 4 rounds.
Andariel, the poisonous daughter of torture! Or, how I like to call her, the spider lady.
This shit takes way too long, assholes!
Thing
You may prevent your opponents from searching the deck.
If you allow someone to search the deck for something you may search the deck for a card of your choice too.
After the 200th card all of the "search the deck"-abilities look like the stupidest idea ever.
Online Movie Review
Action
Destroy 1 movie inspired thing.
This movie sucks!
Captain Nazi
Thing
You may search the deck for "Adolf Hitler" or "Third Reich" and put it on your hand.
As long as "Captain Nazi" is in play, "Adolf Hitler" and "Third Reich" are indestructible. "Captain Nazi" can only be destroyed by action cards.
A Dead Girl
Thing
I guess some know how to use it.
Wrath of Wolfblut
Thing
Action: Destroy 1 thing of your choice which doesn't have at least 1 S in its title.
Rapidshare
Thing
If any player discards a card you choose, before anyone sees that card, whether you take it or another player of your choice takes it.
Is it Halloween yet?
Action
If the last Halloween is nearer to this date than the next Halloween draw 1 card.
If the next Halloween is nearer to this date than the last Halloween, draw 1 card and create 1 Zombie token.
If today is Halloween draw 6 cards, create 6 Zombie tokens and destroy 6 things of you choice.
Honorable Champion Warrior Chicken
Action
When this comes into play you get 3 egg tokens. If this card would be destroyed you may destroy 1 egg token instead.
Destroy 1 thing at the beginning of your turn except for this one.
If at the beginning of your turn this card is the only thing in play you win the game.
You may laugh now, but soon you ate your last hardboiled egg! Or fried egg... or however you prefer your egg.....
Print this deck
