Cards Created by Me
Random Cards
The Best Card Ever
Action - Sticky
The Gods need to get out more! All women in the room are overwhelmingly attracted to one another and must cuddle until this card is somehow canceled. -- This card remains on the table until canceled. If a guy kisses another on the lips, this card is canceled.
This card used to be in Infinite, but I decided to pull it. Everything before -- is straight out of one of the Goonmanji EGS-NP strips. The rest is either bookkeeping (Yes, I KNOW it should be a Thing!) or implementing a later part of the wacky little story arc. El Goonish Shive, for those who don't know, is a really wacky comic online, at http://www.egscomics.com
Weighted Companion Cube
Thing
If Kyevan is playing in this game, Weighted Companion Cube can not be played.
This is my response to people making Portal jokes all the time in a semiprivate chat, Sine Waves. And on the rest of the internet >_>
Infinite Dvorak
Ditto
Thing - Pokemon
You may consider this cards creator to be the same as the creator of a chosen card on the table.
Made in response to seeing lots of cards by the same few people - Probably useless, but fun!
sudo rm -rf /
Action
One opponent of your choice must think of a reasonably common English word. If you can guess this word within three tries, all Things are destroyed, all hands are discarded, and everyone draws a new hand.
I told you password was a bad password!
Ah, a good ol' rm joke :)
There Can Be Only One
Thing
If two or more copies of this Thing are ever in play, all players with a copy of this thing lose.
The intent with this card is for cards that become others, or clone them as tokens, to have something they can clone, but shouldn't.
"Damn it, Jim! I'm a doctor, not a ____!"
Action
Select any number of tokens under your control. Destroy them, and replace them with that many doctor tokens.
Sickbay on the NCC-1701. A place to avoid, if you have a red shirt.
1-up
Action
Play this card when you would be eliminated. Destroy one hundred tokens or Things to stay in the game
Mario not-a die that easy!
Destroy Everything
Action
Remove all cards in play, in the discard pile, in the draw pile, in players hands, or in any other location from play. This card may only be played for this effect when it is February 29th, it is the last card in the players hand, and it is raining in Tokyo. In all other situations, this card reads: "Draw a card."
Codpiece
Thing - Supervillain
Action: Fire crotch-based laser - Destroy a Thing.
Why, God, why did you let this exist!?
TFG: Transformation Gun
Thing
Action: Target living thing becomes male if female, and female if male or unknown.
"Quite disturbing, seeing one's son like that." -- Mr. Verres, El Goonish Shive, 2003-01-27
Dewitchery Diamond
Thing
Action: Target living thing which has become altered in form is cloned, one clone having the altered form and the other reverting to normal.
"Put down the newspaper, dear." -- Mrs. Dunkle, El Goonish Shive, 2003-02-06
