Play onto another Thing. You may change or remove that Thing's flavortext at any time, or add flavortext if it has none.
Action:Draw three cards and swap this card's ruletext and flavortext.
Destroy a Thing. Its former owner gains an Illusion Token with the same flavortext as that Thing
If it had no flavortext, then neither does the Token.
If a Thing is destroyed, destroy all other Things that its owner controls.
Dark Matter Bolt
Target player discards two cards and skips their next turn.
Dim Matter Bolt
Target player discards a card and may not play actions next turn.
Not as good as Dark Matter, but the savings are tremendous!
Gray Matter Bolt
Target player draws two cards.
Food for thought.
Thing:Gain a Token of a type chosen from this card's flavortext.
Energy, Money, Zombie, Node, Worker
At the start of your turn, do what this card's flavortext says.
Play an Action
Do what this Action's flavortext says.
Permanently change target card's flavortext to any value.
Each player writes down a player's name on a slip of paper. One slip is chosen at random. That player is eliminated unless he/she sacrifices one of: three non-Token Things (indestructible Things may not be sacrificed), 20 Money tokens, or any combination of Things (including Tokens) that all of the other players find acceptable.
Action: Create a money or an art token.
Those tattoos have ask me about my issues written all over them -Bub
Action: Destroy a token, create a money token.
What circus did you run away from? -Bub
Action: Destroy a money token Return a living thing to the top of the draw pile.
Dude, Really, I don't want to know any more. -Bub
Change target Thing's flavortext to any value until the start of your next turn, then destroy a Thing with flavortext.
If this sentence is ruletext, destroy up to three Things in addition to any other effects of this card.
Remove target Thing's flavortext until the start of your next turn, then destroy a Thing with no flavortext.
If this sentence is ruletext, each of your opponents discards their hand.
Gugg-Musha, Lord of Dirty Dishes
He is the One! Hoil and Praise to the One! You are the Non-Ones! Shame and Excrements on You!
Action: Everybody discards their hand in shame.
Gurg Gnagba, Lord of Stinky Underwear
He is One! All Hoil to Gurg Gnagba! Hoil! Every time player wants to start turn, he is to put his hand in excrements of cow. If he don't not, he is to discard card. If he don't not or can't not discard card, he is to lose game! All Hoil to Gurg Gnagba! Hoil!
Typical Average Erasmus Student
You may play this under target opponent's control. This student eats 50% of all Things you play from your hand (flip a coin), destroys all beer when he is played and is basically good for nothing.
When this comes into play, each player gets one Handsize Token for each card he/she is currently allowed in their hand (current hand size). Then each player with more than one Handsize Token must destroy a Handsize Token. No-one may hold more cards in hand than he/she has Handsize Tokens. If this card is destroyed, destroy all Handsize Tokens and keep track of hand size as usual.
If the discard pile is nonempty, choose one of the top four cards in the discard pile and play it. Then shuffle the discard pile into the draw pile.
If you control any Tokens, you may change the type of up to three Tokens to whatever you choose.
Delusions of Grandeur
Change target thing's flavortext to "This thing is indestructible."
You win the game.
While this is ruletext, all other cards' flavortexts are the same as their ruletext.
While this is ruletext, all other cards' ruletexts are the same as their flavortexts.
Action: Swap this card's ruletext and flavortext.
Trapped forever in the realm of dreams. Rouse it not from its eternal slumber.
Action: Target player discards a card and destroys a thing they control. If they cannot do both, they are eliminated.
This card's ruletext is the total flavortext of all Things in play. (you choose the order)
This card's ruletext is the total flavortext of all Things in play. (you choose the order)
This card's ruletext is this sentence, followed by this card's flavor text, followed by the flavortexts of all Actions in the discard pile (you choose the order).
Draw a card.
Mission / Machine
Action or Thing
When played as an Action activate the action abilities of up to two things in play.
When played as a Thing, Action: Create a blank token.
I do not pronounce that word like that -R.B.
Misshapen Wiggle Machine
At the beginning of your turn, you may destroy X tokens you control, this card, and X other things.
How was I supposed to know that would happen? -R.B
So for you ...
Draw 2 cards give one of the drawn cards to another player.
Was that a complete sentence? -R.B
Look at each player's hand, then draw a card.
We surveyed the enemy's resources, and we found an unexpected opportunity.
Gain a token of any type, then draw a card.
Gain two Heat, Light or Energy Tokens, then draw a card.
All players discard all but 1 thing (If you play this card, your choice of thing to keep in play must be this card) and may not play other things. If that one thing is destroyed, that player loses.
Kill cards are now literally kill cards.
"Oh no you don't!"
If target player would win the game, shuffle whatever card(s) is causing them to win the game into the deck. They instead do not win the game.
Destroy all cards with rules text longer than 80 letters.
Remove the Axioms
When this comes into play chose a type of token in play and write it on this card. Destroy all copies of that token, No new copies of that type can be made.
Instintanous Proportional Gain
Make one copy of all token types in play
Destroy a Thing that a majority of players agree could be destroyed by a spiked club. Then draw a card.
Target player discards a card, then you draw a card.
Draw a card, then discard a card, then move a card from the discard pile to your hand.
Action: Remove a thing in the discard pile from play, create a zombie token
Just add water
Action: create a money token.
Where else does it come from?
Until your next turn no action abilities my be used
Destroy target thing. Put a Green Goo Token on each non token-thing.
If your hand is ever empty, destroy Hypermode. At the end of your turn, gain a Phazon Token and, if you control at least 3 Phazon Tokens, destroy this and replace it with a copy of Corrupted Hypermode (3662) from the Infinite Dvorak Archive.
Action or Thing: Discard a card to destroy a thing.
Return any number of things you control to your hand, draw 5 cards, discard 5 cards, and play a thing.
Gain control of a Token, then draw a card.
Gain two Money Tokens, then draw a card.
Things cannot be played until the start of your next turn. Draw a card.
The Gods Of Language Are Not Pleased
Eliminate all players whose things contain a total of at least 5 spelling or grammatical errors.
Verbing Weirds Language
Whenever another thing is played, it is put into the discard pile and treated as an action with "Until the end of your turn," inserted into its text wherever would be neccesary to make sense.
With credit to Calvin and Hobbes.
Remember what "Action:" is short for.
Action: If you control a can opener, you win the game.
You did bring the can opener, right? Right?
Win the game if you have at least 6 cards in your hand. Then draw two cards.
If this is the target of a destroy effect flip a coin on heads the effect is canceled Action: Take an inanimate thing from another player.
What? That's not good enough?
Action: Destroy a thing.
Get out of the way!
Action: play two things from your hand.
Zibba Zabba Zoo!
Attack With Everything
Play every card from your hand, and activate the Action ability of every Thing you control that has an Action ability.
Dual Wielded Nuclear Laser Chainsaws
Turn:Destroy two Things
i.e. You may skip one of your turns to destroy two Things. This counts as taking a turn.
Practical? No. Awesome? Definitely
A Drink from a Fire Hose
Draw five cards, then discard six cards.
Destroy exactly ten Things.
Whenever an Action is played, you may return a Thing you control to your hand before it takes effect.
Cashing the Chips
Destroy any number of tokens you control, and draw as many cards.
Action: Destroy a thing. Thing: Return a action from the discard pile to your hand.
I require only knowledge
If this is the target of a destroy effect flip a coin on tails the originating player must also destroy a thing. 'Action: Take a control of a thing from another player.
Let me show you how it's done.
Action & Thing: Return a Living Thing from the discard pile into play.
Be still my brothers, all will be well
Action:Discard a card and gain four Money Tokens.
Action:Destroy a Money Token you control and draw a card.
Envy his profit margins.
If there is a Thing representing a person in the discard pile, other things you control that represent people have "Action:' Destroy a Thing".
Your mother's college roomate's fourteenth cousin killed my philosophy teacher's brother's girlfriend. Prepare to die.
When you play this, gain 3 Meat tokens. If one of your Things would be destroyed by an opponent, destroy a Meat token instead if possible.
Think of it as an industrial-grade meat shield
Action: Choose one Thing under your control and give it to another player. That player must give you control of one of his or her things, but he or she chooses which one.
Action: Gain control of one living Thing.
Whenever Things would be destroyed, flip a coin for each one. If a Thing's coin comes up heads, it is not destroyed.
When Things under your control are destroyed by another player, destroy x+1 Things belonging to that player, where x is the number of Things they destroyed.
Keep it Simple
Cards with more than one word in their title cannot be played.
Play in response to an opponent trying to destroy the only Thing you have in play. It is not destroyed, and the opponent discards their hand.
Whenever a Thing you control is destroyed, draw a card.
Luck o the Irish
This card may be played only if you control two Things or fewer and have four cards or fewer in your hand. Create one Money token.
"Diddle-dee-dee! A lucky penny!"
Wheeled Office Chair
Play onto a Thing you control. When another player takes control of the Thing equipped with Wheeled Office Chair, you regain control of it at the end of your next turn.
Action: Destroy this card and the Thing to which this card is equipped and flip a coin. If the coin comes up heads, destroy up to two Things belonging to the same player.
While this card is in play, all players must keep their hands revealed.
Action: Choose one card from each player's hand (including yours) and discard them.
Destroy a Thing, and discard your hand.
Action:If you don't control any Things, eliminate any number of players.
I've realized that this card game is meaningless
Draw an extra card and discard a card at the start of each of your turns.
You cannot play this from your hand. At the start of your turn, win the game.
Few ever reach this state.
Action: Destroy random thing.
Kill and kill and kill, kill and kill again, Homocidal maniac! -Slayer
Action: Destroy 3 tokens to entertain another player so well they forget to take their next turn. You may not use this ability every turn.
You sir are guilty! -J.C.
We already have a Ted Koppel, who are you? Merlin Mann
Fast-Moving Pulmonary Anthrax Zombies
Put a Disease Token on a living thing.Action and Thing:
Destroy all things with Disease Tokens on them and gain a copy of this card for each.
When you play this, put an Action from the discard pile under this card. You may not play Actions from your hand
Action:Discard an Action card. Play the Action attached to this. It remains attached afterwards.
Do you know how to do anything besides that &%$#@! 2-hit combo?
Windshield Taste Test
Discard in response to a action ability to destroy that thing. When played as an action destroy two things at least one that you control.
Check the local hospitals he just took the windshield taste test then ran. -John
Instead of using the discard pile you may put a card under this card instead. Instead of using the draw pile you may pick a card from under this card instead.
You may play an extra thing every turn.
Move a card from anywhere to anywhere else. You cannot put an Action into play this way.
You may look at the bottom card of the draw pile at any time. Whenever you draw a card, you may take the bottom card of the draw pile instead of the top card.
Take any number of cards from the discard pile and move them to Up Your Sleeve.
Convince Others that You Are a God
When this card is played, it becomes a Thing. While this card is in play, you cannot be eliminated, you have an unlimited hand size, and you draw four cards per turn. Whenever one of your opponents takes a turn, flip a coin. If it comes up heads, create one Doubt token. When there are four Doubt tokens, destroy this card and discard two cards.
Destroy all Things in play whose texts and/or titles contain silent consonants.
CAN'T YOU SEE, HONEY? KEEPING THEM IS STUPID!
Before you draw a card, predict if it will be an Action or a Thing. If you guessed correctly, all other players discard one card.
NSWBA Switch Jump-In Rule
At ANY time, if a card has just been played, you may play a card with the identical cornervalue. Play continues as if it was now your turn - if you played an Action/Thing, the Action/Thing part of your new turn has been used.
NSWBA Switch, the champagne of crazy-eights type games.
When this comes into play, move the top two cards of the draw pile to Up Your Sleeve.
Once per turn, you may swap a card in your hand with a card from Up Your Sleeve
When this comes into play, move one of your Things to Up Your Sleeve
Action:Swap a Thing in play with a Thing from Up Your Sleeve.
If there are at least 10 cards in Up Your Sleeve at the start of your turn, win the game.
Action:Move all cards in your hand to Up Your Sleeve
When this comes into play, create 10 money tokens in Up Your Sleeve.
Action: Move a money token from Up Your Sleeve into play.