Play your cards well and get moar lulz than your opponent. A winnar is the first person with OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND lulz!
WARNING: Many of these cards may be offensive in nature for those who take the internet too seriously. The author is not responsible for those who forget that The Internet Is Serious Business. It's all a big, disgusting joke, and nobody is forcing you to play or even read about the deck. If you don't think this is for you, then stop reading now and prevent unnecessary flamage.
MOAR WARNING: In-joke alert. You are not likely to understand many of these cards.
Special Rules
Hand size
Maximum hand size is 10. Players draw 10 cards at the start and must discard down to 10 at the end of their turn.
Cards per turn
Players may play up to three cards per turn, two of which may be of the same type. (For example: Prima may play two Actions and a Thing, but not three Actions.)
Passing
A player may choose to not play any cards. Instead, the player may then discard a card of their choice and draw a new one. This pass draw is separate from the start-of-turn draw.
Memes
A player may only ever control one of a given Meme. Lolcats are the exception. MILHOUSE IS NOT A MEME.
Meme Actions
All Memes have an associated Action (which additionally may or may not be Instant). These actions may not be used on the same turn the Meme is played.
Instant Actions
Actions marked as "Instant" may be used at any point during the game (though they will usually indicate an appropriate moment) and as such do not count towards the number of cards a player may play during their turn.
Corner values
The value listed in the corner of each card indicates how many copies of that card are included in the deck.
Lulz
OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND is a lot of lulz. The game may also be played to a smaller amount of lulz- multiples of 1000 are suggested.
Card List
Action - Instant
Play in combination with anything that would get you lulz. Double the lulz!
Action - Instant
Play in combination with anything that would get you lulz. Triple the lulz!
Action - Instant
Play in combination with anything that would get you lulz. Quadruple the lulz!
Action - Instant
Play against anything that would get your opponent lulz. Half the lulz, fag. Half the remaining lulz are for you
Action - Instant
Play against anything that would get your opponent lulz. One-quarter the lulz, Gaiafag. Half the remaining lulz are for you
Action - Instant
Play against anything that would get your opponent lulz. One-tenth the lulz, furfag. Half the remaining lulz are for you
Action
Return target Meme to controlling player's hand. lulz +100
Action
Return two target Memes to controlling player's hand. lulz +150
Action - Instant
Completely reverse opponent's Action. lulz +100
In actuality what has been posted may be more correctly attributed to the poster rather than myself.
2
A nice tall glass of STFU
Action - Instant
Your opponent may not play that card this turn. lulz +150
Thing - Meme
Action: Discard X cards for +350 lulz, where X is 5 minus the number of Mudkipz in play.
i herd u liek them :)
Thing - Meme
Instant Action: +300 lulz if thou canst thinketh of a funny medieval way to wordeth the card being playethed.
Bosoms or begone with thee.
Action
Your opponent must immediately play some pr0n or destroy target Thing. lulz +50
Thing - Meme
Action: +400 lulz if you control head, body, moar body and legs. If your opponent controls Tacgnol, using this Action destroys both Memes.
Longcat is looooooooooooooong.
Thing - Meme
Action: +400 lulz if you control head, body, moar body and legs. If your opponent controls Tacgnol, using this Action destroys both Memes.
Longcat is looooooooooooooong.
Thing - Meme
Action: +400 lulz if you control head, body, moar body and legs. If your opponent controls Tacgnol, using this Action destroys both Memes.
Longcat is looooooooooooooong.
Thing - Meme
Action: +400 lulz if you control head, body, moar body and legs. If your opponent controls Tacgnol, using this Action destroys both Memes.
Longcat is looooooooooooooong.
Thing - Meme
Action: +400 lulz if you control head, body, moar body and legs. If your opponent controls Longcat, using this Action destroys both Memes.
Tacgnol si gnoooooooooooooool.
Thing - Meme
Action: +400 lulz if you control head, body, moar body and legs. If your opponent controls Longcat, using this Action destroys both Memes.
Tacgnol si gnoooooooooooooool.
Thing - Meme
Action: +400 lulz if you control head, body, moar body and legs. If your opponent controls Longcat, using this Action destroys both Memes.
Tacgnol si gnoooooooooooooool.
Thing - Meme
Action: +400 lulz if you control head, body, moar body and legs. If your opponent controls Longcat, using this Action destroys both Memes.
Tacgnol si gnoooooooooooooool.
Thing - Meme
Action: Your opponent gets -D3x100 lulz. You get +D3x100 lulz. Roll separately.
Hay guys, I'm about to ruin this thread
Thing - Meme
Action: Your opponent gets -300 lulz and must return target Thing to their hand. Return Goatse to your hand. lulz +50
Hello.jpg
Thing - Meme
Action: Your opponent gets -600 lulz and must destroy a Thing. Destroy Tubgirl. lulz +25
OMFG WHAT IS THAT
Action
Your opponent may choose: discard a card at random or destroy target Thing. lulz +25
Thing - Meme
Action: Say "IMMA CHARGIN MAH LAZER". Discard X cards. Put X lazer counters on Nigra Cell.
Caution: Huge Fucking Laser
Action
Remove 10 lazer counters from Nigra Cell. Your opponent discards their entire hand and draws a new hand of the same size. Destroy Nigra Cell. lulz +350
SHOOP DA WHOOP
Thing - Meme
lulz +D10x10
i can has cheezburger?
Thing - Meme
lulz +D10x10
is it can be hugs tiem now plees?
Thing - Meme
lulz +D10x10
hay guise im an indian lol
Thing - Meme
lulz +D10x10
i r seriose kitn. this r seriose thred.
Thing - Meme
lulz +D10x10
I NEED MOAR INTERNETS
Thing - Meme
lulz +D10x10
ceiling cat is watching you masturbate.
Thing - Meme
lulz +D10x10
OMG ceiling cat is watching me masturbate!
Thing - Meme
lulz +D10x10
it are a fact. i know because of my learnings
Thing - Meme
lulz +D10x10
trashcat is not amused.
Thing - Meme
lulz +D10x10
im in ur base, killin ur d00ds
Thing - Meme
lulz +D10x10
HALP
Thing - Meme
lulz +D10x10
rape is imminent
Thing - Meme
lulz +D10x10
this is relevant to my interests.
Thing - Meme
lulz +D10x10
i has a flavor
Thing - Meme
lulz +D10x10
it's a trap!
Action
Gain +DXx100 lulz, where X is the total number of lolcats in play. Flip a coin. If heads, your opponent gains half the lulz you did.
Don't you know what day it is? Well? Do you?
Action
Your opponent must play a lolcat or destroy a Thing. Your opponent does not get the lulz for the lolcat.
Caturday, bitches.
Thing - Meme
Action: Your opponent flips a coin for each pr0n in play and gets -150 lulz for each tails. You get +50 lulz for each heads. If all are heads, opponent destroys a Thing.
All your CP are belong to him.
Action
Play to stop your opponent from playing any cards during the next turn. This does not count as a pass. Your opponent may still use Meme actions. lulz +150
Action - Instant
Play against anything that would cause either player's lulz to change. You gain any lulz your opponent would have gained; your opponent loses any lulz you would have lost.
Thing - Not a Meme
Play under your opponent's control. Your opponent gets -200 lulz while in control of Milhouse.
Milhouse is not a meme.
Action
Your opponent must destroy a Thing. lulz +100
Thing - Meme
Instant Action: Your opponent must play some pr0n at the same time as another card, or else destroy a Thing. Gain +100 lulz if a Thing is destroyed in this way.
No exceptions.
Thing - Meme
Action: Your opponent must discard half their hand at random. Destroy I divided by zero. lulz +250
OSHII--
Thing - Meme
Action: Your opponent gets -D3x100 lulz for every 300 lulz of yours.
TONIGHT... WE DINE IN HELL
Action
Your opponent gets -100 lulz. You get +100 lulz. If you play two Fifty Hitler Posts in a row, your opponent must also destroy a Thing.
Action
Your opponent gets -200 lulz. You get +200 lulz. If you play two Fifty Hitler Posts in a row, your opponent must also destroy a Thing.
Action
Your opponent gets -300 lulz. You get +300 lulz. If you play two Fifty Hitler Posts in a row, your opponent must also destroy a Thing.
Action
Your opponent gets -400 lulz. You get +400 lulz. If you play two Fifty Hitler Posts in a row, your opponent must also destroy a Thing.
Action
Your opponent gets -500 lulz. You get +500 lulz. If you play two Fifty Hitler Posts in a row, your opponent must also destroy a Thing.
Thing - Meme
Action: Discard X cards to add X desu counters to Suisuiseki, where X <= 5. At any time, remove all desu counters on Suisuiseki to gain +100 lulz for each.
Desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu
Important notes about use with DvorakMUSH
The full deck contains 159 cards, including two "Internets" cards to record the lulz. As this is very close to the Engine's 164-card limit, it is imperative that no further cards be added. The deck is locked, but the warning bears re-stating anyway.
An alternative MUSHcode .txt file is in the works, with duplicate lines for the appropriate cards. It is advisable to copy-paste the file in smaller chunks, as 159 loadcard operations is a lot for any engine to process.
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