To import this deck into the Dvorak MUSH Engine, just cut and paste the quoted commands below straight into your telnet window. (Any card whose type is neither "Thing" nor "Action" will default to "Thing"; if it was somehow meant to be played like an Action, just destroy it after playing it.)
(You can also get an output formatted for the Dvorax Engine.)
cleardeckskipcard The Highest Form of Flattery/T/Whenever chosen opponent draws a card or destroys a Thing, you may do so as well.skipcard Rest/A/skipcard You Win If.../A/Roll a die. 1: ...you control the most non-token Things. 2: ...you have the fewest tokens. 3: ...you have the fewest cards in hand. 4: ...one of your Things has been destroyed since the end of your last turn. 5: ...you reveal an Action with a cornervalue from your hand. 6: There is no "if"; you just win.skipcard Mortmain (AWaD1)/T/All land and place things you control may not be targeted by action abilities.skipcard Ledgermain (AWaD2)/A/Draw a card or put a card from the discard pile into your hand or swap a card in your hand with a card in another players hand. ("nicely done")skipcard Manipulate (M1)/A/Activate the action ability of a living thing that you do not control.skipcard Baby Promulg (5V)/T/Whenever a player discards a card or Baby Promulg destroys a Thing, put a Size token on Baby Promulg.%rAction:If this has at least 2 Size tokens on it, destroy target Token.%r Action:If this has at least 6 Size tokens on it, destroy target Thing.%rAction:If this has at least 12 Size tokens on it, eliminate target Player.skipcard Gluttonous Promulg (6V)/T/Comes into play with 3 Fat tokens. If Gluttonous Promulg ever has no Fat tokens or more than 5 Fat tokens on it, destroy it.%rAt the start of your turn, Gluttonous Promulg eats another non-token Thing of your choice if possible; destroy that Thing and put a Fat token on Gluttonous Promulg. Otherwise, remove a Fat token from Gluttonous Promulg.skipcard Your Horoscope For Today/T/Draw two cards at the beginning of your turn and destroy this card if you do not play either of them during your turn.skipcard Golf Ball Sized Hail/A/Destroy three Things at random.skipcard Oversleep (11:30)/A/Target player must skip their next turn, but they are so well rested that they draw three cards at the beginning of their following turn.skipcard Pink Slip (6P)/A/Remove a living thing from play. ("Turn the salmon copy to your human recourse director")skipcard Clear Envy (P6)/A/Discard this card to take control of another players thing. When played as an action If you have fewer things in play than every other player take a card from another players hand. if you have more reveal the top card from the draw pile. the next time you draw take the revealed card too.skipcard No Token Law (L6)/T/Players destroy all of their tokens at the end of their turn.skipcard The Hammer/T/Action: Destroy a non-token Thing and give The Hammer to that Thing's (former) controller.skipcard Speargun/T/Action: If there aren't any in play already, put a Spear token on an opponent's Thing. Action: Gain control of a speared Thing and destroy the token.skipcard The Recycler (3R)/T/Action: Discard a card and gain a token of any type.skipcard One-Two Punch/A/Destroy a Thing.<BR><BR>Instead of playing a Thing this turn, you may destroy another Thing.skipcard Concentrate/A/Draw a card. Then, draw 2 more cards unless any player destroys a Thing they control.<BR><BR>Instead of playing a Thing this turn, you may draw a card.skipcard Metroid Emblem/T/At the beginning of your turn, gain control of an Energy Token.<BR>If a Thing you control is targetted by a cold-based effect, that Thing's text is blanked until the end of the turn.skipcard Past-Master/T/Action: Choose an Action card or a Thing with an Action ability from the discard pile, use its action ability, and remove it from the discard pile.skipcard Ralphs/T/Roll one six-sided die. The result is the number of Ralphs that you have. The Ralphs all live in this card, which is destroyed when the last Ralph is destroyed.skipcard Fire Hydrant/T/When this card is played, have all players vote on what Water tokens do.%rAction: Roll a die and create a number of Water tokens equal to the result. You may distribute the Water tokens however you wish.skipcard The Very Large Box Of Nothing/T/You may play an unlimited number of Things on this card as a free action. Things on The Very Large Box Of Nothing may not be targeted for card effects and are destroyed when The Very Large Box Of Nothing leaves play.skipcard Dimension of Infinite Kittens/T/At the beginning of each player's turn, put 20 Kitten tokens (acting as Things with "Action: Destroy a Thing" belonging to you) on the field, unless that player discards his hand.skipcard Last Laugh/A/Play when an opponent is about to win. He loses the game.skipcard Energize/A/Place an Energy Token on each of any number of Things.skipcard Recipe For Disaster/T/At any time, you may reveal your hand. If there are at least three food cards in it, discard them and eliminate target player.skipcard Bannana Cream Pie/A/Choose a Thing that has a face. Its text is blanked.skipcard Reflective Coating/A/Negate the effects of any card that would target any of your Things until the beginning of your next turn.skipcard Scroll of Hastening/T/Remove yourself from the normal order of play; instead, take a turn after each of your opponents takes their regular turn.skipcard Twinkie (11/2058)/A/If you have at most two cards in your hand, draw three cards.skipcard Fightball (E2)/A/Players discard their their hand in turn order the last player with a card gets a cheap plastic trophy token. ("That's not how it is played see http://www.fightball.com/")skipcard Jacked Feed (E2)/T/Attach to a non living thing. If the attached thing performs an action roll 2d6 on a 2 destroy this card and the card it is attached to on a 3 or 4 this action does nothing on a 12 destroy this card.skipcard Envoy (E2)/T/If a player would take one of your things the must take the Envoy first.skipcard Gravity Engine (7V)/T/You may play an extra Thing each turn. If you do so, return one of your non-Token Things to your hand.skipcard Refurbishing (8V)/A/Permanently change target Thing's name. All references on that Thing to its old name now refer to its new name.%r%rDraw a card.skipcard Extinguisher (9V)/T/Enters play with 3 Foam tokens on it.%r%rAction:Remove a Foam token from this card and either destroy a Fire-related thing or give target player a Foam token.skipcard Gravy Engine/T/Gain a Gravy Token at the beginning of your turns.skipcard Gravy-Breathing Dragon/T/Other Things you control are blank.<BR>Action: Destroy a Thing. Its controller gains 4 Gravy Tokens.skipcard Asbestos Curtain/T/Fire-based effects may not destroy Things you control or target you.<BR>Action: Give control of this card to any player. They must destroy a Fire-based Thing they control.skipcard Live Faust Die Jung (R3)/A/Every player who has a demon, devil or undead card in play draws a card for every such card to a max of 10. All players with Philosopher, psychologist or therapist card(s) in play are eliminated. ("Title thanks to Big Rude Jake")skipcard Big Rude Jake (3R)/T/Whenever you play an action card pick a target player and force them to discard a card.skipcard Theater in the Round (R3)/A/Discard this card when you hand is at or above your max hand size to reset the current game back to the beginning. When played as an action collect a money token for every living thing all other players control. ("All the world's a stage -Shakespeare or was that Shatner")skipcard When the Bough Breaks/T/Play this card into any player's control. If this card is destroyed, discard your hand.skipcard Astaroth's Choice/A/Destroy all food-related Things and replace each with a Strawberry Candy token.skipcard Spaghetti Tree/T/Action: Gain a Pasta token.skipcard Flamethrower (0V)/T/Enters play with 2 Fuel tokens on it.%rAt the start of your turn, destroy all Things with Flame tokens on them.%rAction:Remove a Fuel token from this card and put a Flame token on target Thing.skipcard Pyromancy/A/Put a Flame Token on target Thing and return this card to your hand, OR destroy all things with Flame Tokens on them.skipcard Wings Of Wax/T/Whenever your hand contains five or more cards, destroy this card and you are eliminated.<BR><BR>Action: Draw a card.skipcard Overblaze/T/When this card comes into play, destroy a Thing.<BR>If a fire-based effect would attempt to destroy a thing, that thing is removed from the game regardless of whether or not it would have been destroyed.skipcard Firestorm/T/If one of each player's non-token Things is on fire, destroy every Thing. Action: Put a Flame token on a Thing.skipcard Backdraft/A/Destroy a Thing that used to have a Flame token on it.skipcard Pyromaniac/T/Draw a card whenever a Thing is destroyed by a fire-based effect. Action: Put a Flame token on a Thing. Action: Destroy a Thing with a Flame token on it.skipcard Flame War (F0)/A/Destroy a number of your opponents' cards equal to the number of cards you have with Flame tokens on them. ("NO HE IS NOT THE AWESOMEST DVORAK PLAYER ALSO YOU SUCK.")skipcard Fire Elemental (E1)/T/This card comes into play with 10 Flame tokens on it. It cannot be destroyed by fire-based effects. If it would be destroyed, instead destroy one of the flame tokens on it. If this card has no flame tokens on it, destroy it. Action: Create 1 Flame token and place it on a card.skipcard Extinguish/A/Target any Thing. Remove all Flame tokens from that thing. ("Mmmmmmf mmmf mmMMmmf mmf mmf - Pyro")skipcard Protective Coating (1X)/T/Your Things cannot have other Things played on or attached to them (including Tokens).skipcard Thuggery (2X)/A/Look at another player's hand and move a card in it to your own hand. That player draws a card.skipcard X Collector (3X)/T/If you control 3 Things with X in their names or cornervalues at the start of your turn, you win the game.skipcard Meat/T/If this card is destroyed by Flame tokens, place a copy of the card Cooked Meat into your hand. ("Meat is murder, tasty murder.")skipcard Cooked Meat/T/If this card is destroyed by Flame tokens, place a copy of the card Burnt Meat into your hand. If you would be eliminated, you may instead remove this card from play. ("Thank goodness I have a super fast metabolism, eh?")skipcard Burnt Meat/T/If this card is destroyed by Flame tokens, place a Flame token on every Thing you control. ("Crispy.")skipcard Dragged across a gymnasium by a midget./A/All players shorter than 4 feet tall draw three cards. (""It happened to me. No joke."")skipcard No money down real estate (M2)/A/Play as many place land, terrain or buildings as you wish from your hand.skipcard Make me an offer (M2)/A/Reveal the top card of the draw pile and auction it for cards or tokens. If no one makes and offer change it's Type to Stuck and this card is now unplayable.skipcard Last Rites (2M)/T/Anytime a living thing goes into the discard pile it's controller may genuflect and destroy a token to remove it from the game. ("My condolences on your loss, they will be missed.")skipcard Burrowing Hydra/T/Gain 2 Head Tokens when this comes into play. If this card would be destroyed, you may instead destroy a Head Token you control.<BR>Action: Give control of any Head Token to target player, or destroy a Thing belonging to a player who controls a Head Token.<BR>Global Action: Discard a card and destroy a Head Token you control. This card's controller gains 2 Head Tokens.skipcard YYZBolt/A/Say the name of a card in play. Any cards in play with that name are repealed from the game. For each word on each card repealed this way, that card's former controller gains a token whose type is that word. ("November 2nd - I have made a breakthrough in my attempts to combine Plasma with Irony.<BR>--ChippyYYZ")skipcard Hold B To Charge Up Power/T/Action: Place an Action card from your hand onto this card OR, if there is already an Action on this card, play it and duplicate one of its effects.<BR>You may not play Actions from your hand while there is an Action card on this card.skipcard Strip Search/A/Chosen opponent must reveal their hand to you. If any of their cards could eliminate a player, they are eliminated.skipcard Black Rod/T/Discard this card when an opponent plays a card to return it to their hand; it is played automatically at the beginning of their next turn instead.skipcard Mosquito Laser/T/Action: Destroy a token.skipcard Orbital Bombardment in D Minor (4X)/A/Choose a number from 0 to the number of Things in play. Destroy that many Things at random. ("Choosing by throwing pebbles at the table in a rhythmic pattern is optional.")skipcard Variations on a Theme by Dvorak (5X)/A/Repeat each action you took last turn, except with different targets. Repeat the same actions again at the start of your next turn, with yet another set of targets.skipcard Cardboard Toccata (6X)/A/Play an Action card and a Thing card and use the Action ability of one of your Things, then take one more Action. ("It looks really impressive if you do it fast enough.")skipcard Flame Port (F9)/T/Action: Remove all Flame tokens from your cards. Place them on an opponent's thing. ("Now that's flaming with Portal.")skipcard Portal (->0)/T/When you draw this card, give a copy of it to an opponent. At any point during your turn, you may give any number of cards to any other player who has a Portal. ("Now that's portalling with Portal.")skipcard Activity Law (L7)/T/All Things without an action ability have the following text "Action: This action does nothing."skipcard Gömböc (G0)/T/If this is ever turned over it reverts to face up at the begining of it's owner's turn. Action: Flip Gömböc over and target living thing may not perform actions until after Gömböc returns face up. ("It's like meditation.")skipcard 20 year old componets (0G)/T/If a immaterial thing you control would be destroyed you may destroy this instead. ("Even the replacement is obsolete -Purchasing Agent")skipcard Steal The Blueprints/A/Look at target player's hand. Take a Thing card from their hand and put it in your hand.skipcard Suggestion Box/T/Action: Draw a card for every living Thing you control and destroy Suggestion Box.skipcard Frost Storm/A/Destroy target Thing. Its controller does not draw any cards at the beginning of their next turn.skipcard Poke/A/Choose an opponent who didn't play an Action during their previous turn. They must give you a card from their hand.skipcard Break It Down, Chippy/A/Draw a card for every card by ChippyYYZ you reveal from your hand.skipcard John Doe (J2)/T/This counts as a Zombie token. ("No really that's my name. -J. Doe")skipcard John Q. Public (2J)/T/Thing: Play an action card from your hand.skipcard Johnny Law (J2)/T/Action: Take control of any Law in play. Action: Remove from the game a living thing that used a destroy effect since your last turn.skipcard Screw the rules, I have money (7X)/A/Destroy any number of your Money tokens to draw half that many cards (round down). Then play any number of cards from your hand.skipcard Stargazer (8X)/T/At the end of your turn, look at the Nth card from the top of the draw pile where N is the number of players.skipcard Pocketfull of Starlight/T/At any time, you may destroy this card and draw 2 cards.skipcard Screw the rules, I have pizza/T/Give an opponent a slice of pizza: Take an extra turn at the end of this one. Play this ability at any time.skipcard NguNbuLe's Boon/A/Erase target thing's first sentence OR return a Thing from the discard pile to your hand OR destroy a Thing.skipcard Pocketfull of Stardust (Xµ)/T/At any time, you may destroy this card and N tokens to draw N cards, where N equals the number of playersskipcard John Smith (j2)/T/When you play this from your hand replace the rules text with the rules text of any Living thing in play ("Yes that's my name, and alot of other guys too. J. Smith")skipcard Slice of Pizza/T/If destroyed as food, create a cardboard token ("Didn't you follow the directions? you were supposed to remove this before cooking.")skipcard Admin Promotion/T/Turn: Remove target Thing from the game.skipcard Overstuffed Closet (9X)/A/Return a random Thing in the discard pile to your hand and gain six Junk tokens.skipcard Peterhead (P3)/T/Whenever you control a female thing destroy this thing. Action: destroy a non living thing.@emit [name(%#)] pastes the Infinite Dvorak deck/Cards 4901-5000 into the Dvorak Engine.